most part I paid for them.â
Those eyeglasses slipped down on her nose, and she peered at me over the top of them. âWe canât do that here. We cannot spend our own funds to finance Priscilla Home.â
âWhy not? I canât ask the Lord to give us groceries when I have the money in my pocketbook to pay for them.â
âThat will not work here. There are always many needs at Priscilla Home, and you could spend every penny of your income and still not meet all the obligations.â
She was so matter-of-fact, so sure of herself, I could see how easy we might lock horns. Ursula was a stringy woman and didnât fit in that big office chair. She tried leaning back in it but that didnât help. Then she started fooling with a paper clip, bending it out of shape. âWhenI first came here as director, my father instructed me meticulously about how to bring Priscilla Home up to professional standard.â
At her age, is her daddy still running her life? I wondered.
âMy father is a learned man, and I respect his judgment,â she was saying. âFund-raising is the boardâs responsibility, he said, and he forbade me spending my money on needs here. That would lead to my financial ruin.â
âIs the board doing the fund-raising?â I asked.
âNo,â she said, a bit put off by my asking. âIt hasnât worked out that way.â Leaning forward, shuffling a stack of papers, she appeared to be looking for something. âHere, this is what Iâm looking for,â she said as she handed me a Priscilla Home prayer letter. As I was reading it, she informed me, âThis is a faith ministry. We depend on donations from our constituency and from grants given by foundations. That letter you have in your hand was mailed to our contributors two weeks ago. We should soon begin receiving contributions in the mail.â
It was a prayer letter, all rightâlike so many of those letters I would get and have to throw in the trash because it took all I had to support my own church. âYou send out letters?â
âYes, we send out letters. That informs the public of our financial needsââ
âAnd you ask foundations for charity?â
âYes, of course.â She looked provoked. âThatâs the way all nonprofits are funded.â
âNonprofits?â
Annoyed, she threw the paper clip in the wastebasket and started toying with another one. âYes, nonprofits like hospitals, research centers, and so forth. Any such organization can apply. I spend hours writing proposals for grants, and since I came here two years ago, weâve received one, a grant of fifteen hundred dollars. I have eleven proposals in the mail and am in the process of writing six more.â
The way this conversation was going made me uncomfortable. I didnât exactly know how to say what I wanted to, but I had to say something or I knew Iâd regret it later. âUrsula . . . I donât think of Priscilla Home as just another nonprofit organization. Itâs a Christian ministry. To ask for money makes it look like the Lord canât take care of us.â
Ursula sat bolt upright, her elbows on the desk and her fingers twisting that paper clip to beat the band. âDo you consider that my appealing to a foundation and writing letters to our constituency makes us mendicants?â
âI donât know what you mean.â
âMendicants are religious persons who live off alms. Do you consider that my appealing to foundations and sending letters to our contributors is begging?â
âWhat would you call it?â
The phone rang. She answered it and spoke briefly with somebody. As she was talking, I noticed the black circles under her eyes. No wonder , I thought, sheâs probably up half the night writing them proposals to foundations .
When she got off the line, there was an edge in hervoice. âEsmeralda, how do you propose
Marina Dyachenko, Sergey Dyachenko