How embarrassing. I must’ve
seemed like a demonic toddler to her. I wished she wasn’t too
turned off by my actions. I wanted to impress her, not disgust her!
Holding my breath, I nodded, and swallowed the bestial meat, audibly.
We looked into each other’s eyes.
Two minutes later, I was gnawing on a zombie’s
boiled breast. A whole breast that jiggled like fine Jell-O with each
bite I made.
The nipple was included.
Happy, I threw it at Barbara, who caught it in her mouth
and gave me a thumbs up.
Fade out.
Eighteen.
We slogged for six hours, hiking up many trails and
searching through many bushes. There were many undead stool samples
to be found, but Barbara deemed it unnecessary. I had already
experienced the zombie’s dried dung. Barbara’s main goal
was to teach me the ways of the hunter – the steady growth of
the sidekick into hunter knighthood.
At around 9pm, it was time to find a soft place to set
up the tent. Barbara excused herself so she could urinate in peace. I
said that I’d do the same.
As I sat on my heels behind a bush and pushed for
heaven, a shadow moved – in the darkness between two trees.
My buttocks shut tight.
I stared intensely into the woods, slowly zipping my
pants and catching my breath.
A Japanese schoolgirl slouched out from the dark.
I stood up, embarrassed, and combed my hair with my
hands.
“ Hello,” I said, politely. “How may I
help you this fine night?”
She didn’t respond…only looked down to the
ground. This girl kept walking at a very slow speed. I knew when she
began moaning, and drooling moths, that she was a member of the
living dead.
My heart drooped.
What a depressing sight.
How can something so attractive be so dead?
My mind wandered and I literally had to slap myself
straight. Barbara wasn’t too far off. I went to get her as the
zombie followed me.
I asked if we should kill it. Barbara had a plan. She
eyed the zombie from head to toe and instructed me to tie back its
hands – only its hands – and for me to go to sleep as she
took it out for a walk.
I did as I was told and crawled into our tent, falling
fast asleep.
I woke up at 3am. Barbara wasn’t in the tent.
Afraid for her safety, I took a stake and went out venturing for her,
flashlight in tow.
There was a tree in the distance, on a tall hill.
Figures were on it, moving around.
I began to hear moaning sounds.
Scared, I ran back to the tent.
5am. I couldn’t go to sleep. Barbara returned, so
I closed my eyes and rolled over. She yawned and went to bed. Barbara
smelt strange. She was covered with a familiar scent – a
familiar scent that was now laced with the dead’s perfume.
5:30am. The wind began to pick up and rattle the tent. I
wanted to hurt Barbara. I grabbed my flashlight and stormed out from
the tent. It was a noisy exit and I hoped that yes, indeed, she heard
me.
It was raining again, the wind blowing the storm
sideways.
I hugged myself for warmth.
Soon, I found myself back at that tree under the
moonglow.
The cheerleader was sitting on the dirt, in the nude,
her arms tied behind the tree. She wasn’t moving…head
bowed…hair swaying to the cool breeze.
I squatted in front of her.
She looked so peaceful.
The zombie sensed me and looked up, eyes totally black.
It groaned. I knew that zombies had no emotion other than anger and
sometimes confusion…but at that moment, I sensed shame in the
beast.
I exhaled and stood up.
The thing slithered about, trying to stand.
I closed my eyes and held my flashlight close to my
heart, tightly. I looked up to the dreary clouds. The raindrops felt
good, massaging my face.
Taking a good stance, I gripped her head with my free
hand and hit the creature over the skull with the flashlight until it
stopped looking at me.
I threw my red-covered flashlight into the bushes and
went back into the tent.
Barbara was sound asleep.
She hadn’t followed me. She hadn’t cared.
I
closed my eyes for not a minute when I