Fart Squad Read Online Free PDF Page B

and looping andzigzagging wildly above them. He grabbed frantically for a basketball hoop to anchor himself, but missed. Noisy farts propelled him every which way.
    â€œOh dear!” he shrieked. “I suspect I should not have indulged in that second burrito!”
    Darren chased after the dangling safety rope. “Don’t worry! We’ll pull you down!”
    He grabbed the rope, hoping to reel the flying kid in, but Walter’s farts had more lift than he’d expected. Before he knew it, Darren took flight as well.

    â€œHang on, Darren!” Tina yelled. “Don’t let go!”
    She, Juan-Carlos, and Stan pushed the trampoline back and forth across the floor, trying to keep itunder their airborne friends. Darren gulped when he looked down and saw how far up he was.
    â€œGet us down!” he yelled at Walter. “This is crazy!”
    â€œI’m endeavoring to do just that!” Walter yelled.
    The extra weight began to drag Walter down. Darren pulled himself up the rope so that more of it dangled below him. Stan and the other kids grabbed the rope and pulled Darren and Walter toward the trampoline. Darren waited until it was directly beneath him, then let go of the line.
    â€œAAAAAAA!” he screamed as he fell.
    He hit the trampoline and bounced off it onto the floor. The mats cushioned his crash landing . . . a little. His poor butt was going to be black and blue, on top of being burnt.

    â€œDon’t just sit there!” Tina called. “Help us get Walter down!”
    Working together, Stan and the squad finally managed to tug Walter safely down. Juan-Carlos borrowed a barbell from the gym storeroom to weigh down Walter so that he wouldn’t take off again.
    â€œDon’t be discouraged,” Stan told Walter. “You just need more practice.”

    â€œWonderful,” Walter said glumly. “I can scarcely wait.”
    Now it was Darren’s turn. Stan noticed that Darren hadn’t tried the burritos yet.
    â€œWhat’s the matter, Darren?” the janitor asked gently. “Is there a problem?”
    â€œI’m not sure about this,” Darren confessed.“You don’t realize how hot my farts get.”
    â€œI’m not surprised,” Stan said. “You’ve always had plenty of energy to burn. But the Fart Squad needs you, Darren. You’re a born leader. I can tell. Just look at how you rushed to help Walter earlier.”
    Darren appreciated the pep talk, but he was still uneasy. “But what if my farts are too hot to handle?”
    â€œAll the more reason to find out just how scorching they can get,” Stan said. He wheeled the cart of burritos toward Darren. “These have gone cold. Let’s see if you can reheat them.”
    â€œUm, we’re not going to have to eat them afterward, are we?” Juan-Carlos asked. “’Cause I think I’m allergic to fart-cooked food.”
    â€œDon’t worry,” Stan said. “There are plenty more where these came from.” He stuck a cooking thermometer into the cold burritos. “Go ahead, Darren. Bake those beans.”
    Darren didn’t want to let the others down. He forced down half a cold burrito and turned his backside toward the rest. His stomach startedgurgling right away. He felt the hot gas building inside his gut.
    â€œWatch out!” he warned. “Fire in the hole!”
    A volcanic fart erupted through the seat of his jeans. He tried to control it, but it was like a blowtorch. The thermometer blew its top. Overheated burritos exploded, spraying beans everywhere. Goopy burrito guts were splattered over everyone’s hair and clothes. Even Tina was a mess.
    â€œNooooooooooooooooo!” she exclaimed in horror. “I’ve been burrito’d!”
    â€œI’m sorry!” Darren shouted. “I told you I couldn’t control it!”

    Darren surveyed the damage. Thanks to him, his new friends looked