crêpe de chine. On a chaise longue by the window lounged her brother Lemuel, languid and splendid in white tie and tails, whom her maid had just summoned up from the parlor.
"Charles and Jane Pratt will be at the Mortimers' tonight. I've asked Clara Mortimer to seat you next to Jane."
Lemuel threw up his arms in disgust. "Just because I couldn't take you to the Sykeses' on Friday? Really, Kitty, how vindictive can a sister be?"
"Bore Insurance should pay you three hundred for her."
Kitty and her brother paid dues to a small private group which listed the biggest bores in Gotham and paid off at so much a head to any member who found himself stuck beside one at a dinner party.
"But it's cheating if you arrange it with the hostess! I'm surprised at you, Kitty."
"
I'll
pay you the three hundred then."
"Happily, I have no prejudice against taking money from a woman."
"It's a comfort that I can always depend on your being devoid of senseless male inhibitions."
"I'm not such an ass, anyway, as to take
that
for a compliment. But tell me what you want me to do with the sublime Jane Pratt. Not make love to her, I trust?"
"Could one? No, I simply want you to convince her that Osgood is in no way like his father. Charles Pratt is actually objecting to the match. He doesn't fancy his beloved Felicia as Roger's daughter-in-law."
Osgood sat up. "His own law partner?"
Kitty shrugged as if the vagaries of the male sex were beyond her. "It seems he objects to Roger's ethics."
"Well, I certainly can't blame him for
that\
But what about his own?"
"That's what Osgood asked. The poor boy is in a terrible state. He had no idea that Roger wasn't like any other lawyer."
"That's the trouble with New York. He is."
"Now, Lem, don't be pompous. I haven't asked you to hold forth on the evils of modern society. Pratt apparently told Osgood that he had stayed with the firm after Roger became a partner only to counteract his 'bad influence.'"
"And to make a very good living as he did so!" Lemuel clapped his hands and hooted. "I'm only sorry the great Dickens is not alive to put Pratt in a novel. He would excel Mr. Pecksniff as the archetype of hypocrisy. Has Roger heard of this yet?"
"No! And he mustn't or he'll blow us all to Kingdom Come! That's where you come in. I have almost persuaded Jane Pratt to talk her husband out of his silly attitude. I count on you to put in the finishing touches."
"Is it really worth it? I'm not at all sure that Osgood couldn't do better than the Pratts. I was hoping he might catch a real heiress from one of the families that are still climbing. A Vanderbilt, for example."
"No, no, I know where we are socially, my dear. The Pratts are just right for us. It's all very well for you, a bachelor, to talk about our doing better. It's easy enough for you to go anywhere you like. But for a woman it's different. There are plenty of dowagers in this town who are ready to do me in if given half a chance. My success has aroused envy, and don't fool yourself that that war has been forgotten yet. And even if it had been, Roger's snooty attitude about Yankees would revive it. If we had a real showdown with a couple as respected as the Pratts, it might upset my applecart!"
Lemuel appeared to be weighing this. "Well, I suppose there may be something in what you say. Jane Pratt
is
a descendant of Peter Stuyvesant, though I doubt if half the new families even know who he was. How do you want me to approach her?"
"What I really need is to get her to make Charles drop his condition."
"A condition to his consent to the wedding?"
"Yes. It's a very stiff one, I'm afraid."
"What
is
Charles's condition?" came a voice from the doorway, and they both turned to face Roger. Kitty's self-possession rarely deserted her. "Oh, a silly condition," she replied casually, as if relieved that his arrival had saved her the trouble of sending for him. "You know what a stickler Jane is in matters of etiquette. Apparently they're in mourning
"Charles and Jane Pratt will be at the Mortimers' tonight. I've asked Clara Mortimer to seat you next to Jane."
Lemuel threw up his arms in disgust. "Just because I couldn't take you to the Sykeses' on Friday? Really, Kitty, how vindictive can a sister be?"
"Bore Insurance should pay you three hundred for her."
Kitty and her brother paid dues to a small private group which listed the biggest bores in Gotham and paid off at so much a head to any member who found himself stuck beside one at a dinner party.
"But it's cheating if you arrange it with the hostess! I'm surprised at you, Kitty."
"
I'll
pay you the three hundred then."
"Happily, I have no prejudice against taking money from a woman."
"It's a comfort that I can always depend on your being devoid of senseless male inhibitions."
"I'm not such an ass, anyway, as to take
that
for a compliment. But tell me what you want me to do with the sublime Jane Pratt. Not make love to her, I trust?"
"Could one? No, I simply want you to convince her that Osgood is in no way like his father. Charles Pratt is actually objecting to the match. He doesn't fancy his beloved Felicia as Roger's daughter-in-law."
Osgood sat up. "His own law partner?"
Kitty shrugged as if the vagaries of the male sex were beyond her. "It seems he objects to Roger's ethics."
"Well, I certainly can't blame him for
that\
But what about his own?"
"That's what Osgood asked. The poor boy is in a terrible state. He had no idea that Roger wasn't like any other lawyer."
"That's the trouble with New York. He is."
"Now, Lem, don't be pompous. I haven't asked you to hold forth on the evils of modern society. Pratt apparently told Osgood that he had stayed with the firm after Roger became a partner only to counteract his 'bad influence.'"
"And to make a very good living as he did so!" Lemuel clapped his hands and hooted. "I'm only sorry the great Dickens is not alive to put Pratt in a novel. He would excel Mr. Pecksniff as the archetype of hypocrisy. Has Roger heard of this yet?"
"No! And he mustn't or he'll blow us all to Kingdom Come! That's where you come in. I have almost persuaded Jane Pratt to talk her husband out of his silly attitude. I count on you to put in the finishing touches."
"Is it really worth it? I'm not at all sure that Osgood couldn't do better than the Pratts. I was hoping he might catch a real heiress from one of the families that are still climbing. A Vanderbilt, for example."
"No, no, I know where we are socially, my dear. The Pratts are just right for us. It's all very well for you, a bachelor, to talk about our doing better. It's easy enough for you to go anywhere you like. But for a woman it's different. There are plenty of dowagers in this town who are ready to do me in if given half a chance. My success has aroused envy, and don't fool yourself that that war has been forgotten yet. And even if it had been, Roger's snooty attitude about Yankees would revive it. If we had a real showdown with a couple as respected as the Pratts, it might upset my applecart!"
Lemuel appeared to be weighing this. "Well, I suppose there may be something in what you say. Jane Pratt
is
a descendant of Peter Stuyvesant, though I doubt if half the new families even know who he was. How do you want me to approach her?"
"What I really need is to get her to make Charles drop his condition."
"A condition to his consent to the wedding?"
"Yes. It's a very stiff one, I'm afraid."
"What
is
Charles's condition?" came a voice from the doorway, and they both turned to face Roger. Kitty's self-possession rarely deserted her. "Oh, a silly condition," she replied casually, as if relieved that his arrival had saved her the trouble of sending for him. "You know what a stickler Jane is in matters of etiquette. Apparently they're in mourning
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