Faithfully Read Online Free PDF Page B

felt it was none of her business, unless he felt he needed her blessing to start sleeping over. 
                  “Get that look off your face. Lily told me while we made snacks. Actually, she was asking me if there was a reason Alex didn’t stay the night. I told her to talk to you and Alex and she told me she did.”
                  I was confused. “If she talked to you already, then why did you play dumb at dinner?”
                  “Because, my dear, you would have jumped in her poop. The poor girl wouldn’t have stood a chance. You would have told her it wasn’t her business, not to bring it up in mixed company, and blah, blah, blah. That poor girl has been through a lot, and although she is only eight, she is older than her years. You just don’t like to admit it.” My mother’s tone was firm, and she was right about Lily. She seemed older than her age and wise beyond her years. There were times I felt like she lost a lot of her youth with David’s death and the twins. She had to help a lot, and I felt it forced her to grow up sooner than she should have.
                  “It’s jump in her shit, and you are right, I would have. We discussed it this morning and I explained to her why. I’m not a hundred percent sure why you feel the need to get involved.” I kept my voice flat. My mother was good at playing a victim and saying I was yelling or picking on her.
                  “Because if I don’t, you will screw things up. You are not the best judge when it comes to people.” I knew she was taking about David. “I like Alex, he is a good person, and he loves you and those girls. Who else moves to a small town in the middle of nowhere?”
                  She was right, he gave up a lot to be here, and he wasn’t getting anything out of this move.
                  “Who are you protecting?” My mother was looking straight at me as she spoke, and it felt like her eyes were burning into me. “Are you keeping him at a distance for you or the girls? Because he has already showed more love in the past few months than their father showed them in the years he lived with them.”
                  I had tears welling in my eyes. I didn’t know who I was really protecting. I had already exposed the girls so much to him, so that if he did leave they would suffer and be hurt again. I kept telling Lexi that I don’t allow him to stay because I don’t want to have sex in the house with the girls home. Honestly, I’d been lying to myself a lot lately, and saying it so much made me believe it was the truth.  
                  “I don’t know. I thought I was doing what was best for all of us. Well, maybe not Alex, but the girls and me.” I paused for a second and looked down at my hands. I could hear my mother shuffle around the island and sit next to me. “I didn’t want to rush anything. Last time I jumped in with both feet, and I ended up in Vegas on spring break my sophomore year of college and was married by Elvis. I’m slightly impulsive.”
                  “Slightly? Listen, do things in your own time if that is what you need. The reservations you are having, I understand, but you can’t keep holding your past against Alex. You need to either let him in completely or let him go, because it is not fair to him. You both deserve to be happy, and those girls are already happy again. I can see it in all of you. You are all happy, so take down your guard and let him in.” She was right. My guard has been up to the point of me being a bitch at times. I wasn’t sure how Alex put up with it this long.
                  I kissed my mother on the cheek and gave her a hug. She looked surprised. I decided it was time to take down my guard with Alex, and also with her. I haven’t always been fair to her and knew I couldn’t keep holding my past with her against her now. I said