good enough to do what I planned. I picked the window ’cause it was on the side, behind the trees. But I could see that there was a canopy bed inside. So I’m pretty sure it was Carolina’s room. Jeez . But I wasn’t trying to do anything to her . They weren’t home.
“I don’t hate her,” I say. “I figured if her brother’s hurt, they’re probably at the hospital, so she won’t be home.”
“Is he in the hospital?” Another sniff. “How do you know?”
Mom gives me another shut up look, and I shrug.
“I don’t know. I’m going to do my homework. I can help you, maybe.”
“Like you’re so smart.” My sister’s in gifted and won’t let anyone forget it.
“I think I can handle fourth-grade work,” I say.
“You can call her after dinner,” Mom chimes in.
Melody wipes her eyes with the back of her hand.
“A-all right,” she says.
Mom sends her in to blow her nose. “And wash your hands too,” she yells after her.
When the water starts running, Mom faces me.
“Now are you going to tell me where you were this morning?”
Jeez! She knows I was out .
“No. You just have to believe I wouldn’t do what they’re saying.”
Monday, 2:30 p.m., bus home from school
DARIA
One time ,
I was on my bench at lunch ,
listening to my most favorite CD
which is
Pink .
Kids say NO ONE
listens to Pink
anymore .
But I do .
I like her .
I was dancing
a little ,
to “I’m Coming Out,”
and Alex Crusan
was there .
He said ,
“You like Pink?”
“Yeah,” I said ,
“her hair.”
“Me too,”
he said ,
“she’s not afraid
to be different.”
Then he said ,
“Would you ever
dye your hair
pink?”
And I laughed
and couldn’t
even stop
laughing .
All the days
after ,
he said hi
just hi
and I
liked him .
Mama worried that
I liked Alex Crusan .
She thinks
I am a baby .
She asked Mrs. Taub ,
my counselor ,
was it okay ,
okay, me liking Alex Crusan?
I felt
stupid .
But Mrs. Taub said yes!
Mama said
I can like him
but not go
to his house .
“Don’t bother him, Dari.”
Mama would be mad .
But last night ,
I went .
I didn’t do anything ,
anything wrong ,
just looked
at his house
in the dark .
Then
I saw him .
Not Alex, the other boy ,
the fat, mean boy .
He threw a rock .
I wanted to tell
but
I
didn’t
tell
anyone
about
that
rock .
Monday, 2:30 p.m., Memorial Hospital
ALEX
Now that they stopped the medication, my head’s clear. Unfortunately, that only helps me remember what happened this morning—in real time and surround sound.
Old Mr. Khan at the donut shop says he could set his watch by me. He opens at six Mondays, and that’s when I get there. I have to go early to make it before school. Other mornings I work out with weights in the garage. Just because you’re terminal doesn’t mean you can’t be buff. I’m getting better about mornings. When I was first diagnosed, I could barely get out of bed some days. Like, what’s the point? That’s what I thought. Now I make myself. But I still don’t use a seat belt when I drive—what’s the point when you’re going to die anyway?
This morning I left the house around ten of, maybe even a couple minutes earlier because I was so worried about Mom coming down on me. I saw that girl, Daria, this Down Syndrome girl who lives on East Main, about a block from our house. She’s always there Mondays when I go by. Maybe she’s there other days too, or maybe she’s waiting for me. I think she has a crush on me. I talk to her at school sometimes, just say hi, like whatever. No one else does, really. They let the disabled kids ( differently abled they said in Miami, like the word made a difference, like it changed who they were) go to the regular schools— mainstreaming , they call it. It’s supposed to make them fit in the real world. It seems like a bad idea to me if people are going to be mean to them. And they are. They’re mean just like they are to me, call her