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wasn’t lost on me that I was acting a bit like Beth-Ann Bracelee. But I didn’t care.
    â€œI told her a bunch of times that you needed the money,” Susannah said, her own voice hushed, just in case. “The last time I said it, she just started crying. It was really sad.” I rolled my eyes. “No, really, Lorrie. It was. Did you ever think that maybe she needed you at home?”
    â€œWhatever. You could’ve at least clued me in to her meltdown.”
    â€œI just figured it had all worked out.”
    â€œYou knew she hadn’t gone to the bank to replenish the Money Drawer. In what world do you think that means things are ‘all worked out’?”
    â€œWhat I know is, you don’t want to be home, and you’re taking it out on me. I’m going to go downstairs and take care of my babies.”
    â€œKittens. Not babies. You didn’t give birth to them. But that’s not . . . Fine.” My last word was spoken to an empty space, as Susannah had already jumped away in her usual quicksilver fashion. She was never the girl who would duke it out, but rather was always hiding around a corner, under the table, or, most often, up in a tree. One hard-flung word was all it took. I might not see her again for a day.
    I’d been harsh, but I’d been right. My brain was sizzling with anger at both my aunt’s uselessness and my sister’s indifference. And right now the most important thing for me was to get myself settled, physically and emotionally, in the safe space of my own room. My only refuge in this sorry excuse for Home Sweet Home.

4
    LET ME HELP
    I WOKE UP WITH RENEWED ENERGY. LIFE SOMEHOW feels easier to manage in the morning than it does at night. Even if your problems are the same old clothes, you can put them on fresh and feel new possibilities.
    So here it was: I had two months before I was due back at Hillyer, and I had a plan. I’d go along with what Gigi apparently wanted and stay at Edgewater for the summer. I would bring back Orion and board him at Oceanfront. I didn’t think Orion would mind; for my horse and me, home was wherever we were together. Meanwhile I’d cozy up to Gigi, make her really comfortable, and help her realize how much easier things could be if I were in charge. I’d get her to sign over the rights to my trust, and I’d pay everything that needed to be paid. I’d make sure Susannah was taken care of—bonus if I could manage to extricate her from Brian while I was at it. And then I’d packup my stuff and head back to Hillyer for senior year, secure in the knowledge that nothing like Woodscape would ever happen again.
    Of course, I wasn’t yet eighteen, and I’d probably have to petition to be an emancipated minor first, like those child actors. But if judges were willing to declare boozing, partying Hollywood teens free from their parents and in control of their own money, then certainly I would meet the requirements.
    I climbed out of bed to unpack. We’d just had our white-glove laundry service at Woodscape, so nearly everything I’d brought home was clean and pressed. I settled the stacks neatly in my dresser drawers and headed into the bathroom. I swept open the shower curtain to discover a dead silverfish, belly-up, and one of the cats had apparently used the tub as a litter box. There were four squares of toilet paper left on the roll and no spare rolls in the cabinet under the sink.
    Just when you think you have it all figured out, you’re out of toilet paper
, I thought to myself.
    But a roll of toilet paper could be replaced—in fact, I’d buy enough to keep the whole house stocked for the rest of the summer. A little gesture to show Gigi just how on top of things I was.
    With the last four squares of tissue I picked up what the cat had left behind and dropped the mess into the toilet, then I turned on the shower and watched the silverfish swirl down the drain