Dead City Read Online Free PDF Page B

said Laura, emptying the last drops into her already-full glass.
    “Yeah.” said Ashley, unsure whether she actually wanted to go return to the house.
    “Don't be like that.” Laura said, nudging her. “You've loved that house ever since you first laid eyes on it.”
    “Past tense relevant right now...” Ashley said, her words trailing off as she looked away.
    “Um, ladies?” said Steve, backing out of the kitchen slowly.
    “Yes?”
    “Dinner is...” he turned to them, then took another glance at the kitchen counter. “Dinner is dancing on the worktop.”
The two women poked their heads round the corner and watched with an unfamiliar combination of amusement and terror as a large salmon danced the lambada with a head of broccoli.
    “Have you maybe thought about going to the Spectre Advice Bureau?” asked Steve.
    “I guess that's my next stop.” replied Ashley, watching uncomfortably as the salmon switched the dance up to a tango and leaned over to the dish resting on the stove, returning with a sprig of parsley in its mouth.
     
    * * * *
     
    The next morning Ashley walked up the steps to the angular, angry-looking building that had become The Spectre Advice Bureau, a plaque by the entrance proudly stating:
    Established October 15 th 1977
Opened by HRH Queen Elizabeth.
    Ashley walked in, not convinced that the declaration was something the building and its occupants required a plaque to commemorate, even if the Queen did drop by for five minutes to cut a ribbon.
    The inside was as drab as the exterior, as if the seventies had nested, laid eggs, then crawled up and died. She approached the drab off-white reception desk, the clerk interrupting as she opened her mouth, before Ashley could even get a single consonant out.
    “Possession, haunting, reanimation or miscellaneous?” he asked, in a monotone drawl.
    “Haunting.” Ashley replied.
    “Apparition, spook, spectre, poltergeist, ghost or miscellaneous?”
    “Poltergeist.”
    “That's a P-O-6-4-6 you need then.” the clerk said, leafing through a drawer and pulling out the relevant form.  He slid it over to her.
    “It's not a normal poltergeist.” she said. “At least, that's what the exorcists said.”
    “Were they government licensed exorcists?”
    “I don't know?”
    “You'll need to see a specialist then.” he said, snatching the form back. “You'll need a P-O-6-4-7.”  after a further rummage through the drawer, he slid a new form across the counter.
    Ashley took a seat and filled the form in, taking it back to the clerk and proceeded to wait three hours for her appointment. Everyone else around her who was waiting seemed to get seen almost instantly.  Eventually her name was called, and she walked along dull grey corridors, into a dark room with a crystal ball at the centre of the table. A large Caribbean woman was sitting behind it.
    “Am I in the right place?” Ashley asked.
    “Yes y'are.” said the woman. “Got a spirit I see.” she was looking over Ashley's shoulder.
    “Is it here?” she asked, turning and seeing nothing behind her. “Is he here?  Is it a he?”
    “It is. But not f'long.” The woman's long, plump fingers waved around the ball, and it started to glow.
The light shone into the room, and as Ashley turned her head to hide her eyes from the light, she saw a figure standing behind her.
    “Ash!” it said, in a voice like the wind.
    “Yes?” she replied, trying to make out the details of the spirit, who mostly looked like a faceless silhouette in the glare of the light.
    “It's me, Ash. Can you see me?”
    “Who are you?”
    “I was trapped for God knows how long, it was so fucking boring! But I'm back! It's going to be okay no--”
His words were cut off as the light reached a crescendo, and in an instant, the apparition was  gone. The orb at the centre of the table now had a faint glow, indicating that the spirit was trapped within the confines of its spherical glass walls.
    “There we go,