Dark Blue: Color Me Lonely with Bonus Content Read Online Free PDF

stopped now, because lunchtime is running twice as long as it normally would, but I am determined not to be the first one to leave this table of red and blue. I feel fairly certain that such a move would only invite open season on me. And so I smile and nod and laugh when appropriate and just stay put. I manage to eat about half of my salad, but my stomach is feeling more and more like it’s tying itself into tight little knots.
    “Have you guys heard the latest?” asks Amber suddenly. The tone of her voice says this is breaking news and the entire table becomes instantly hushed. “Clarise Owens just told me that Brett Hawkins asked Gwen Morris out.”
    “You’re kidding!” declares Betsy as if this must be illegal, immoral, or just plain ignorant. “Brett is really taking her out?”
    Amber nods. “It’s true. Ask Clarise.”
    “You’re just jealous, Betsy,” teases Ashley.
    “No way!” says Betsy. “I am
not
jealous of Gwen Morris. Everyone knows she’s a fat, ugly cow.”
    “Apparently Brett doesn’t think so,” says Amber.
    “Yeah,” says Ashley as she squares off her shoulders and sits a bit straighter. It looks like she’s trying to show off her overly large chest. As if she needs to. “Some guys like a woman with curves.”
    “Yeah,” says Betsy.
“You
should know.”
    Ashley narrows her eyes now. “Are you calling
me
a cow?” Thankfully, the lunch bell finally rings and the table begins to clear, although Ashley and Betsy are still going at each other. I have to wonder about this as I dump my tray. I mean, if these girls are that hard on each other, how tough might they be on an outsider like me?
    “Now that wasn’t so bad, was it?” asks Jordan as she catches up with me.
    I shrug. “I guess not.”
    She smiles. “You did great, Kara. Just keep it up and everything will be cool.”
    I don’t mention to her that it feels like I’m getting a serious stomach ulcer or high blood pressure or that I’m freaked that my antiperspirant has probably failed me today.
    “You coming to the game tonight?” she asks as she adjusts the skin-tight top of her blue and red uniform. “It’s our first one, you know. And then there’s the dance afterward too.”
    Normally Jordan and I would always go to games and dances together—when we went, anyway, which wasn’t always. “I don’t know,” I say.
    She stops right in the middle of the hallway and just stares at me like I’m totally losing it. “You
have
to come to our game tonight, Kara. You’re my
best
friend and this is my first night to cheer. I can’t believe you’d considering ditching me like that.”
    I force a goofy grin. “Hey, I’m just kidding, Jordan. Of course I plan to come.”
    She smiles now. “Well, that’s better. Sheesh, you were really starting to worry me.”
    “Sorry.”
    “I’d offer you a ride,” she says lightly, “but the cheerleaders are supposed to get there early to set some things up.”
    “That’s okay.”
    “But my parents are going to be there. Of course, they’ll be sitting in the general admission section, but I’m sure you could sit with them if you want.”
    So now I am wondering how I can possibly manage to pack up the nerve to go to a football game by myself. I mean it’s nice to think I could sit with the Fergusons, which would beat sitting all alone. But isn’t it kind of lame to sit in the adult section? But if I don’t, who will I talk to? I am not good at this
independent
thing. I even consider inviting my little sister to come along with me just so I won’t have to sit by myself. Now tell me, how pathetic is that?

six
     
     
    I DO NOT KNOW WHY I WASTED MY TIME COMING TO THIS STUPID FOOT ball game. First of all, it’s freezing cold out here, and besides that our team totally sucks—it’s forty-five to three in the second half. But the icing on the cake is that Jordan has completely ignored me.
    I thought she might come over and say hi at halftime. But no. She didn’t so