Dare to Breathe Read Online Free PDF Page B

together.
    Nathan laughs and runs his hands through his hair. “She was getting kind of clingy.” He smirks at me. “You actually saved me an embarrassing get away from her.”
    “Jesus Nathan!” I play punch him. “Mandy and Carrie were right, you are a chick magnet, and a bastard too!”
    “Oh, come on; you never played around before?” he says with a warm smile.
    I stop walking as I consider his words. I know he is messing with me.
    “No, I haven’t,” is all I say.
    He stops and looks back at me. I hear him clear his throat but I have already started walking again.
    “Sam wait!” he says as I hurry on, embarrassed by my outburst. He takes my hand and turns me towards him. “I’m sorry if I offended you. I keep forgetting how innocent you are.”
    “I am definitely not innocent,” I whisper back. I need to bring this conversation to a close so I give him a half-hearted smile and say, “Besides we can’t all be man whores like you!”
    Nathan sees my lame attempt at turning the conversation round and gives me a smile back. “Come on Sleeping Beauty, let’s get you home.”
    It’s not until we get to the front door that I realize I have held his hand all the way home and not freaked out.

Chapter Eight
    “Alex? Freddie? Where are you two?” I hear my six-year-old self say out loud.
    I walk around the apartment looking under mattresses and beds but can’t find anyone. I walk into the kitchen where he is sitting.
    “Where are Alex and Freddie?” I ask him.
    His eyes slowly turn to me and look at me from head to toe. He smells bad like stale tobacco and body odor. His eyes are red and I wonder if he can remember last night at all.
    “Piss off right now Sam,” he finally says, holding onto his head and looking back down at his coffee cup.
    “But the boys…” I say.
    Without warning he stands up quickly, knocking the chair back as he does so and throwing his cup towards where I am standing. The cup misses me but hits the wall next to me spraying hot coffee all over me.
    “I said shut up!” he yells.
    I run out the kitchen and into the back yard. I hide behind the shed breathing hard but no one follows me. I stay outside in the cold until nightfall. I see no sign of my brothers and I am scared—scared to move, scared for them, scared for me. I eventually hear the front door slam shut and know ‘he’ will be out for a few hours. I creep inside and head back into the kitchen where I search for food. There is none so I drink some water from the tap and go into my room. I take off my dirty clothes, find my warmest pajamas, and lie under my bed, knowing that when he comes home, he will be stinking drunk. I do not fall asleep until much, much later.
    The door bangs open at midnight. I know this because my Mickey Mouse clock Granny bought for me when she was alive, is pointing at the twelve o’clock. I hear uneven footsteps head towards my room. My heart beats faster and I start crying and screaming! No! No! No!
    “ Sam, honey. You’re here. You’re safe,” I hear a voice waking me.
    I kick out but the hands hold me gently but firmly. I take a deep breath to scream but open my eyes as I do so, seeing a face I am beginning to trust and know, and stop myself just in time. I rest my head on Nathan’s shoulder and cry. He sits there, not moving and not crowding me but gently whispering sweet reassurances until I calm down. He tells me about his life before college living out on a farm. He tells me stories about Ben, Mandy, and Carrie as kids swimming in the creek near his home. He talks and talks and I just sit there absolutely still and listen, letting his voice chase away the demons so fresh in my mind. My muscles relax and I fall gently back down onto my bed. Nathan shifts his weight so he is leaning on the headrest of the bed and continues to talk until, exhausted, I fall back asleep.
    When I wake up, I am alone but I can still smell the scent of Nathan in my room. His smell reminds me I am safe