Coco Pinchard's Big Fat Tipsy Wedding: A Funny Feel-Good Romantic Comedy Read Online Free PDF Page B

‘He’s as thick as two short planks but lovely to look at.’
    ‘Call yourself a Genie? I’d like to see you try and squeeze into a lamp,’ grinned Oscar.
    ‘I’m big boned!’ said Wayne winking at me. They showed me through the hallway and into a small front room. The place was a tip, but homely. Wayne said that an old lady had lived in the house since the fifties, and when she died, they carted her off and rented the place out with all her belongings still in situ.  
    ‘Why are you dressed as a Genie Wayne?’ I said.
    ‘I’m doing TIE, for my sins.’
    ‘What’s TIE?’  
    ‘Theatre in Education, a tour of local schools with a clapped out version of Aladdin. Today’s school was a bit rough,’ he said.
    ‘One of the little bastards stole his clothes out of the changing room, so he had to come home on the bus in his costume,’ grinned Oscar.
    ‘Luckily I keep my wallet and keys in my magic lamp,’ he said. ‘Would you like a cuppa tea Mrs. P?’  
    ‘Yes, please. Do you know when Rosencrantz will be home?’ I said.
    ‘He got a job interview,’ said Wayne.
    ‘Don’t you mean a casting?’ I said pushing a pile of magazines along the sofa and sitting down.
    ‘He’s got an interview at Abercrombie and Fitch to work in their Savile Row store over Christmas,’ said Oscar.
    ‘If you can call it work,’ said Wayne. ‘All Oscar seems to do is stand outside with his shirt off flirting with the punters!’
    ‘I fold some jumpers too,’ grinned Oscar. ‘I’m just going to grab a shower,’ he said.
    ‘I’m just putting some dark stuff through on a hot cycle, do you want me to do your workout gear?’ said Wayne.
    Without any warning, Oscar stripped off his shorts and t-shirt down to just a pair of briefs. I couldn’t help admire how beautiful he was. They both went off and Wayne came back ten minutes later with a full tea set, side plates, and a giant chocolate cake. I was in heaven.
    ‘I'm sorry to hear about your feller,’ said Wayne as he poured. ‘Rosencrantz said he was the one.’
    ‘Did he?’
    ‘Yes. Nice was he?’
    ‘Yes…’ I said awkwardly.
    ‘Knew his way round a woman?’
    ‘Um…’   Luckily at that moment Rosencrantz arrived back home.
    ‘Hi mum,’ he said giving me a huge hug. ‘I see you've met the guys.’
    ‘Yes, they’ve been very hospitable,’ I said.
    ‘And I approve of Mrs. P,’ said Wayne to Rosencrantz. Oscar came down the stairs dressed in a tracksuit with wet hair.
    ‘Hey man, how did the interview go?’ He said.
    ‘I got the job!’ Oscar did a high five with Rosencrantz.
    ‘Oh, love that’s wonderful,’ I said proudly.  
    ‘Come on Oscar,’ said Wayne. ‘Let’s give them some peace.’ They took their tea and disappeared into the kitchen.
    ‘Shall I show you my room mum?’ said Rosencrantz.
    We went upstairs to a little bedroom with a view of the railway sidings behind the house. A train clattered past. I sat on his bed, which was neatly made with Bitch sitting on the pillow.
    ‘Dad phoned me, fishing for the gossip. So did Nan,’ he said sitting at a little table, which had his TV and laptop on it.
    ‘What did you tell them?’
    ‘That you and Adam had parted company.’
    ‘Well, he dumped me, Rosencrantz.’
    ‘I wasn’t going to give them the satisfaction of hearing that… What are you going to do now?’
    ‘I don’t know,’ I said. ‘I haven’t got any work on till the book is published next year. I’m off to see Chris’ new play tomorrow night, the one he’s been directing. Do you want to come?’
    ‘I can’t Mum. I’ve got staff training in the evening at Abercrombie & Fitch.’
    ‘I’m so proud of you, supporting yourself,’ I said.  
    ‘I could move back home? If you’re lonely,’ he said.
    ‘No! I’m fine. It looks like fun here, you should enjoy your freedom. That Wayne seems interesting.’
    ‘He’s great.’
    ‘And Oscar is gorgeous.’
    ‘I know… I’ve already shagged