Child Of Music Read Online Free PDF

quickly. So, repressing a sense of panic almost equal to Janet's own, she glanced across the room to where the first two or three performers were preparing nervously for their entry on to the platform and, on a rapid reckoning, decided that she still had about a quarter of an hour before she herself would be called on to take any active part in the concert. Then she sat down with Janet's hand still in hers and made a tremendous effort to see the problem from the child's own viewpoint.
    Reasonable argument and false cheerfulness would, she could see, be alike useless. She must accept the situation at Janet's valuation or give up here and now.
    'Listen, dear—' she made the child face her, so that their eyes met— 'I do understand that for all of us there are people who scare us and make us feel inadequate. If your aunt is one of those people for you, I'm not going to pretend it's a small matter. But, Janet, I must tell you now that I've made a very special effort to get Mr. Tarkman here tonight to hear you play. I didn't tell you beforehand for fear of making you nervous—'
    'He doesn't make me nervous. Only my aunt does,' reiterated Janet with a sort of stubborn wretchedness.
    'I understand that,' Felicity said patiently. 'But it's Mr. Tarkman who is important tonight. He has come to hear you in the hope that you'll prove suitable for a place in the Tarkman School.'
    'Can't I play for him when my aunt isn't there?' Janet gazed rather forlornly back at Felicity.
    'I doubt if another opportunity could be arranged. Can't you summon all your courage, ignore your aunt and make the effort?'
    'I don't think so,' said Janet. 'I feel sick.'
    So did Felicity, she discovered to her surprise. But she could not think about her own reactions at that moment. Mary would probably have regarded Janet as a tiresome child who had no right to invent difficulties at this late hour. But Felicity knew that behind the frightened child was a deeply disturbed artist and, with a slight sigh, she tried again.
    'I hardly know what else to say to you, Janet. I can't force you to play, of course. But this is a great chance for you, and I can't bear to see you throwing it away without so much as trying.'
    Janet looked down at her clasped hands, and then up again as though something other than her own misery had impinged on her consciousness.
    'You said it was difficult for you to get Mr. Tarkman here. Does that mean you'd be made to look small if I — if I just backed out now?'
    It had not been in Felicity's mind to plead her own false position. But she felt so desperate at that moment that even a little bit of emotional blackmail seemed justified.
    'My position isn't really what matters,' she said. 'But, since you mention it, yes, I would feel rather awful. You see—' determinedly she put herself on the same footing as the child— 'I once made rather a fool of myself to Mr. Tarkman. I was over-confident about a personal opinion and was afterwards proved wrong. I was so sure that I was right about you that I rather stuck my neck put again. I suppose if my candidate actually refused to perform tonight he would think me more of a fool than ever. But if you feel you simply can't—'
    Janet took out her glasses, polished them nervously and put them back again.
    'I'll play,' she said briefly, and Felicity with difficulty refrained from embracing her. Instead, she just said,
    'That's a good, brave girl. Forget your aunt and play for Mr. Tarkman.'
    'Where is he sitting?' Janet inquired.
    'I don't know,' lied Felicity, realizing that Janet was still unaware that die important Mr. Tarkman and the hated aunt were together. She just put up a confused little prayer to whatever guardian angel looks after temperamental geniuses and hoped for the best.
    In ordinary circumstances, of course, a school concert would not exactly have taxed Felicity's nerves. On the contrary, she was expected to be the calm support of the jittery young performers she had to accompany. But