Capture the Wind for Me Read Online Free PDF Page B

“I’ve begun to feel how unfair this is to you. Now you mention at supper that your best friend’s goin’ out on her first date. I don’t want you to feel that you’re tied to this house every Friday and Saturday night. Your mama and I said that you could date when you’re sixteen, and nothin’ about that’s changed. You understand? Even with all the work you do, I still want you to feel like you’re sixteen.”
    â€œOkay, Daddy,” I managed. How awkward, talking to him about going out. Hurt seared through me. I missed Mama so much! She was supposed to be here to help me with guys and romance. How could I possibly play her and be sixteen at the same time? “Nobody’s asked me out yet anyway,” I added with a little shrug.
    He smiled. “They will.”
    I looked at my lap, wondering why we were having this conversation. A suspicion, dark and ugly, niggled at my brain. “Daddy,” I said abruptly, “why did you tell the Kings we’d go to their at-home?”
    He blinked at the change in topic. “Why shouldn’t we go?”
    I lifted a shoulder. “Have they invited lots of people?”
    â€œProbably. The Kings know lots of townsfolk, between their relatives and all the men that work with Jason at the mill.”
    Exactly, I thought. “So why did they invite us?”
    â€œWell, I did help Katherine King the day she arrived in town. And she did meet you and Clarissa and Robert at church.”
    He held my gaze, crinkling his forehead. Somehow I knew he feigned the puzzlement.
    â€œYou like her, don’t you,” I accused.
    He drew a breath. Now I’d done it. I’d crossed the line from unspoken to spoken, and he’d have to answer.
    â€œWhat makes you say that?”
    I pursed my mouth. “That’s not fair. Taking my question and turning it back on me.”
    â€œOkay.” He drew out the word, stalling for time. The sudden strangeness between us hung in the air. As if I were the parent, questioning the ill-advised plans of the teenage child. “Tell you the truth, I don’t really know her.”
    I looked away. That’s not what I meant, and he knew it. You didn’t have to know someone very well to be attracted to that person. “Oh, forget it.” My voice sounded tight. “It doesn’t matter.”
    Daddy opened his mouth, then shut it again.
    â€œJackie,” he would tell me much later, “I couldn’t help being pulled toward Katherine. Surely now you can understand my loneliness at that time. Do you know how many nights I couldn’t sleep in my empty bed after your mama died? I slept on the couch. Time and time again I’d force myself to be patient with Clarissa and her math, when all I wanted to do was scream my frustration that I didn’t have a wife to help. Coworkers at the bank would complain about small things, and I’d think, ‘You think you have problems.’”
    Yes, Daddy, I understand now what I could not then. Now I know what it is to fall in love. To feel the giddy swirl of cringing anticipation and sodden hope. I know what it is to have your heart want to burst from your skin with longing. I know what it is to lose.
    â€œWell.” I shifted toward the open book on my desk. “I have to get back to work.”
    â€œSure.” I heard the bed creak as Daddy pushed to his feet. When he reached my door, he hesitated. “Jackie, I really am grateful for everything you do. Your mama would be proud.”
    I squeezed my eyes shut at the words. “Thank you,” I said softly.
    He closed the door and left me.

chapter 5
    N o doubt Bradleyville will never see another “at-home” the likes of the one for Katherine May King.
    Katherine did not come to church that morning. She’d stayed home, her mama explained with embarrassment, to get things ready. This raised more than a few eyebrows, as Bradleyville