Born This Way Read Online Free PDF Page B

that my body and mind were manifesting.
    I started to come out in college. At the same time, I was drawn to the alternative music and culture of the era. I obsessed about bands like the Smiths, Siouxsie and the Banshees, Kate Bush, and The B-52s, devouring magazines like
Trouser Press
and
After Dark
, road-tripping from our tidy suburb to classic Manhattan dance clubs like the Ritz, Pyramid, Boy Bar, Save the Robots, and Danceteria. My house-music cherry was popped at the legendary Paradise Garage.
    If only I could go back and tell the young me not to worry so much about what everyone else thinks about him. I would tell little Bill to embrace his inner joy and that it’s okay to celebrate, feel free, and love unconditionally!

clinton, age 13
    Other children often asked me, “Are you a girl or a boy?”
    Granted, it was the 1970s and clothes were a bit more flamboyant, but I had a boy’s haircut, a boy’s name, and I wore white tube socks, for God’s sake! “Girlboy” and “Fruit Loop” were just two of the nicknames I accrued in my early years.
    One summer day we went to a family reunion. I wore a sleeveless blue terry-cloth T-shirt with matching shorts. I thought it to be a “safe” and “butch” choice, since I always wore it with sneakers and tube socks, not my beloved flip-flops. (I’ll have you know I wore flip-flops back when no boy would be caught dead in flip-flops! You’re welcome!) We arrived at Aunt Anna and Uncle Adam’s home, and just as Aunt Anna started making the family reintroductions, Uncle Adam, who had been ogling me from behind his Coke-bottle spectacles, pointed at me and asked, “And who is this lovely young lady?” Beat … beat … awkward silence … polite laughter. Sweet Aunt Anna did her best to cover for him: “Oh, Uncle Adam, he’s as blind as a bat.” Yeah, well, was the old man so blind he couldn’t see my tube socks?!?
    Looking at this photo, taken just after that awful moment, I can see how much I wanted to disappear! But it’s hard to believe I once wanted to hide from the very thing that put me in the spotlight. You see, I am a Girlboy! A Fruit Loop! And I’ve made a career out of it! What I wouldn’t give nowadays to have someone look at me and ask, “And who is this lovely young lady?”



fernando, age 4
    I feel very proud of the courage it took for me to stand up for what I believed in, and to dare to come out at age twenty-three in conservative and Catholic upper-class Mexico City. At the beginning, the process of coming out seemed painful and nearly impossible. I felt as if I’d be the only homosexual my friends and family would ever have to deal with. Pretty soon after I started the coming-out process, I realized that wasn’t the case. I had the support of my friends and family, but it took a little time for them to accept me. And, to my huge surprise, my three closest childhood friends turned out to be gay as well. So it’s no wonder we remained friends all these years!

sarah, age 4
    For this kindergarten photo, I told the photographer I wanted a “serious picture.” The more he tried to make me smile, the more serious I got. And I did not like this dress. I wanted to wear my fireman’s hat, which I was usually allowed to do, since my parents weren’t really invested in any particular gender expression. I love this picture because of its emotional honesty: I’m not smiling because I don’t feel like smiling. No one was going to push me into feeling or doing something I didn’t want. This is harder to accomplish as an adult, but it’s always my goal.



gary & larry, age 5
    We were always happy kids. When you have a twin, you’ve always got a playmate. We grew up Southern Baptist and went to church three times a week, so we were around constant messages that gay people were sinners who were going to