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She stood up. "But from here it's easier. We'll just turn a few pages at a time until we get to X. Look!" She lifted a page with her paw and they could see how light it was. But there were such a lot of them!
    "Or we could eat them," Marvin suggested. He took a small bite of a
P
page, and made a face. "It tastes awful," he said.
    "Hey!" Frederick shouted. "Look!" He aimed his tail carefully and flipped a page open with it. "We can do it with our tails! Are all of your tails in good shape?"
    There were squeaks and nods.
    "All right then. Line up."
    It took them a little while to get the hang of it. But after a bit of practice, and with Hildegarde calling directions (her own tail was a little weak, having once been caught in a door), the mice began turning the pages quite rapidly by using their tails as tools.
    "
Q!
"
    "
R!
"
    "
S!
"
    They made their way through the alphabetized pages until finally they arrived at X. There they stopped to rest.
    "My tail is tired," Charles said.
    "Mine too," echoed several other mice.
    "When we get back, we'll go to the hot water pipe by the men's room and drape our tails over it for a while," Hildegarde said. "A little heat treatment will fix us right up."
    She jumped up on the open page. "You know, we don't even really need to eat all the
X
pages. We just need to find the Great X and destroy that page. If we do it carefully, and then close the book again—"
    The other mice all groaned. Closing the book would mean another huge pushing effort.
    "Well, maybe we could leave it open. He'll probably think he left it that way. We'll just have to nibble the edges so carefully that he won't notice the missing page."
    "Norma and I will tidy it up," Charles said. "We're very, very good at that."
    "All right," Hildegarde announced. "Let's find the Great X." She looked down at the page she was standing on and read: "X-Treme Bodybuilding."
    "Nope," Frederick said. "That's not it."
    "X-rated DVDs."
    "Nope."
    "X-ercise Bikes."
    "Nope."
    "X-cellent Cake Decorating."
    "Nope."
    Hildegarde read on and on through the three full pages of Xs.
    But the Great X was simply not there.
    Dejectedly the mice decided that it would serve no purpose to eat the entire telephone book. To make themselves bloated and sick, and for what?
    They gave up. One by one they lowered themselves from the desk. Tails drooping, they left the office and trudged down the hall, through the transept, across the front of the chancel, and back down the center aisle, heads bowed in disappointment.
    Lucretia appeared, waddling across the narthex. She stared at them contemptuously. "Problems?" she asked, with a malicious smile. Lucretia was always hoping for some way to oust Hildegarde and elevate herself to the position of Mouse Mistress. "Something you can't solve, Hildegarde? Getting a little old? Need my help?"
    She smirked.
    "No," Hildegarde replied tersely, and continued on past.
    Ar The line of dejected mice entered the wall one by one. It was rather like a funeral, Hildegarde thought, as she brought up the end of the slow, sad procession. But at least at a funeral, there were flowers to eat.

Chapter 6
The Great X

    Father Murphy made the call first thing Monday morning. Hildegarde was watching from behind the radiator. She had taken the shortcut through the wall to his office and emerged beside the radiator pipe. It was a route that was too dangerous in winter, when the pipes were hot. But now, at the end of September, the furnace had not yet been turned on.
    She saw him turn the pages of the telephone book and then run his finger down the page until he found the number. Amazingly, it was near the
front
of the book, not the back, where they had found the
X
pages.

    Hildegarde was puzzled by that. She hoped he would leave the book open so that later, when he had left the room, she could check. Perhaps all by herself she could eat that page, in case there was a next time. But for now, it was too late. Father Murphy picked up the receiver