Bill 4 - on the Planet of Tasteless Pleasure Read Online Free PDF

for what seems like forever.
    The End
    The beautiful princess called Irma sighed and put her head into her hands.
    Bill rubbed her back sympathetically. Such a sad story. It was also the most incredible load of lachrymose bowb that he had ever heard. Only he didn't dare tell her that since he still had plans to get into her knickers. “You know, maybe a little sex would cheer you up!” he said brightly.
    “Oh, Bill. Let us just forget awhile the crude lusts of the flesh! I think you are one of the most majestic creatures I have ever seen. May we simply commune from soul to soul?”
    “Soul to soul? Isn't that a Galactic Motown record by Outta Sight and the Pimps?” Bill said.
    “No, silly! It's a form of Romantic Psychic Telepathy, just like in BLAZING ROMANTIC SCIENCE COMIX!”
    And when she flashed her baby blues at him, Bill simply turned to silly putty in her hands. Having drunk the entire goblet of wine may have had something to do with this malleable state, but actually Bill was in fact as smitten as his tough Trooper training would allow.
    And so, for a time, the sweet object of his affection communed with Bill's soul on a spiritual plane, which did absolutely but nothing for him. And it really had been a long day. Clutching her warm hand in his he drowsed off and communed with some heavy zzzzzzzz's.

CHAPTER 5
    THE RAPE OF IRMA
    Lightning, across a bloodshot landscape.
    Thunder, banging out like a brobdingnagian belch accompanied by the wail of a thousand petulant pussies.
    Bill woke up — vaguely — to spaghetti.
    Color-coded spaghetti, wound into a coil, snaking away into machines, chugging and clicking, needles needling, dials dialing.
    A squeaky voice: “Partial consciousness, Unit Alpha V!”
    Another voice, chalk on a blackboard: “Dampen! Dampen!”
    “Endorphins at optimum level already. Unit resisting unconsciousness. Awareness level reaching drugged but dangerous level.”
    Bill groaned. Where the hell was he? He saw stretches of stainless steel stained by little green amorphous blobs.
    Focus! He had to focus. Where the hell was his Trooper discipline?
    “Well then, slug him again, you idiot!”
    A mass of resonant density fell directly upon Bill's noggin, and once more this particular Starship Trooper saw the stars.
    When Bill awoke the next time again, he found his head in the sweetly scented lap of his beloved Irma. She was stroking his hair and gently rambling on about the delights of pussies.
    “...and then there was Featherhead! Oh, that cat just adored his catnip! Of course, we had to get him declawed after he scratched that poor serf's eyes out, but oh well!”
    Bill scrunched around and was rewarded with a magnificent upshot view of Irma's magnificently impressive breasts expanding above him, blocking out the view completely. Which was all right with him.
    What a Heaven!
    What Paradise!
    What an incredible existence! Who cared where the hell he was! Bill immediately decided that wherever he was it was lightyears better than anywhere the Troopers could send him.
    With satiated pleasure the lovebirds talked and sipped the dear wine for a brief eternity beneath an Aegean sun, not too far at all from the wine-dark sea, and just down the hill from Mt. Olympus, while sprites and songsters, dancers and satyrs played with Maypoles and whiled away the day with more of this kind of bucolic, fresh air Bacchanalian stuff.
    Bill could not remember when he had been happier. Though to be precise Bill could not remember ever being happy, but it does not pay to split hairs: for a gentle two or three hours the sun shone, orgone surged through Bill's body and his sperm-filled eyeballs swelled mightily under the pressure. He was relaxed and content, caught up in the fanciful spell woven by the climate, the wine, and the concupiscent creature prattling incontinently on beside him.
    Little did this happy-for-an-instant Trooper realize that this happiness would be oh, so brief.
    Irma had suggested a walk.
    She