Beauty from Surrender Read Online Free PDF

to mention that our whole relationship was based on a lie."
    "Baby, I have faults. I'm not perfect."
    "Don't call me baby." Jack Henry is the only one I want calling me that. "And no husband and father should ever refer to his wife and children as faults."
    He turns me around to face him. "All of this is about him—that Australian bastard I talked to on your phone. He's the reason you're blowing me off—because you still want him."
    "I will always want him."
    Blake's face changes and is no longer soft or wanting. It's angry. "Do you want him more than you want your career?"
    I think he's threatening me, but I want to hear him say it. "What's that supposed to mean?"
    "Exactly what you think it means. You know how easily I can end you, so you have two choices: either come back to me or your career is over. Simple as that."
    I stare at him, astonished. I can't believe he's capable of such a ruthless threat. He says that he's giving me two choices but that's horseshit and we both know it. He's trying to bully me back into his bed. It infuriates me so much that I have a knee-jerk reaction—as in I jerk my knee up into his balls as hard as I can—and he's instantly face down on the concrete of the parking garage.
    I jump into my car and slam my hand down over the lock because I don't know where his head's at. My hands are shaking so badly, I fumble to get the key into the ignition. My old Honda roars to life and I feel a streak of something—maybe strength—and decide I'm not finished with Blake yet.
    I want to run over him but decide that probably isn't the best idea, so I lower my window instead. "You can take my songs you're holding hostage—along with our contract—and shove them all up your ass. And when you get your balls out of your gut, sue me for breach of contract so I can tell the world what a cheating, lying little prick you are. And a fucking lousy-ass lay. As in terrible!"
    I leave half the rubber of my tires behind as I spin out and immediately begin to panic.
    What did I just do?
    Who am I kidding? There's no mistaking it—I just killed my career.
     

     
    I thought I'd hit rock bottom before but I couldn't have been more wrong. This place I now reside is one level of hell below it.
    I walk like a zombie through my apartment until I reach my bedroom and fall backward onto my bed. I sigh as I stare at the ceiling and watch the oscillating blades of the fan, thinking about how they remind me of my life. Each blade is chasing the one in front of it but it's a fruitless race. None of them will ever catch up to the one ahead. The story of my life. I chase the happiness right in front of my face but it always outruns me, no matter how fast I am.
    I lie like that for a while before I eventually drift off. I have no idea how long I've been asleep when my phone wakes me with the "Jolene" ringtone. Fabulous. Jolie Prescott is exactly what I need right now.
    I contemplate letting it go to voicemail but I know she'll only continue to call. Persistence—it's one of her gifts. "Hi, Mom."
    "Laurie, I've been waiting all day for you to call with an update on your meeting with David and Blake. Why haven't I heard from you?"
    It was a mistake to tell her I was meeting with them. I don't want to talk about this right now, but she's not going to give me a choice. She never does. That's another one of her talents but it doesn't mean I won't try to get out of it. That's one of my skills.
    "It's a long story and I don't really want to talk about it right now. Maybe we can get together a little later and discuss it."
    "That means it didn't go well. Please come over. We need to talk about this so we can get a game plan on where we should go from here."
    I love that—where we should go from here. She had a real presence in the industry at one time and knows the ins and outs of how things work. Maybe she'll have some ideas on which direction I should go because I damn sure don't know which end is up at this point.
    But I'm not