Barbara Silkstone - Wendy Darlin 04 - Miami Mummies Read Online Free PDF Page B

laugh that lifted his saggy jowls and blocked his hairy nostrils, causing him to hack.
    “You can’t leave your assets neglected with no one to manage them.” I hated to be mean and squelch his dream but his paranormal mental gymnastics required tough love.
    I folded my arms across my chest and shook my head, no. “The court will appoint some friendly lawyer as executor for your estate. He’ll get a fat fee for selling off your hotels. Sweetie, once you’re dead, you’re dead.”
    I could hear his dentures wobble as he ground his jaws.
    “That’s why I picked you, little darling. You are my executrix with explicit written instructions that no probate occur until I’ve returned from the afterlife. Besides… they’re not going to miss me. Mrs. MacGuffin says my turnaround time will be less than a month.”
    Mrs. MacGuffin?
    It was a hair-brained scheme. I imagined myself stalling probate in court. “I can’t—”
    “You will. You have to. Promise me.”
    Oh shit. Another deathbed promise. I must look like an escapee from the Heroes wing of Madame Tussaud’s. Just ask Wonderful Wendy. She’ll do it.
    Hic’s lip twitched and his left eye drooped. I couldn’t bring myself to argue with him tonight. Not alone with no one to help if he clutched his chest and fell over dead. He’d never forgive me if he went into the great beyond without a proper will. Hic was a sibling-less, life-long bachelor. The government would swoop in like a flock of crows.
    I believe in reincarnation, so did Gandhi and Ben Franklin. I just doubt you can aim yourself at a new body, pop back in, and pick up all your old toys. Then again, Dracula managed to hang on to his castles, wives, and a clutch of classic coffins.
    “How will I recognize you?” It seemed like a silly question but if I was going to do this I might as well be in for a pound as for a penny.
    “My new name is already in the will. I will find you and give you the password, which will identify me as me. Okey dokey? Then you announce my passing and introduce the new me as my legitimate heir. One of the documents I’ll be signing tomorrow leaves my entire estate to one, Alex Hiccup.”
    The blood rushed to my head. “Who’s Alex Hiccup?”
    “Me!” he said with a mischievous grin lifting his wrinkles. “There’s an envelope with my new identification in my safe deposit box.”
    “But how do you know—”
    “The only thing I don’t know for sure is my gender. I assume it’s male but if it’s not, what’s it like having tits?”
    “I wouldn’t know.” I slugged the remains of my coffee and shuddered.
    Hic yakked on about his upcoming reincarnation-transmigration while the Looney Tunes part of my brain kicked in with an image of the old gent returning not as a human but in the form of Michigan J. Frogg. He would tip his high hat and in a desperate croak lay claim to his forty-plus slum hotels. He would desperately ribbit the password, but without opposable thumbs the amphibian wouldn’t stand a chance in court.
    Being in possession of the key to Alfred Hiccup’s safe deposit box and acting as the decider of who gets his loot scared the bejesus out of me. Not sure which was worse: propping up his dead body or fending off would-be inheritors. Hic might as well have painted a bull’s eye on my forehead.
    He pushed his plate aside and reached across the table to hold my hands. I caught myself as I recoiled from his greasy fingers. He was a dear old friend and I was a born sucker. I extended my palms. His touch felt like a chamois all soft and mushy. Refusing his cry for help was not in my DNA.

Chapter Six
    I knew Hic too well. He had more up his sleeve. I asked the question, dreading the answer. “What else do you want me to do?”
    Hic squeezed my hands. “I want my Remington bronco. You have to get it back. The password was secretly engraved on the bottom years ago. I want you to melt it down in front of me before I pass.”
    That darn statue.
    I tried to