Atoning Read Online Free PDF Page B

calm. Daniel’s opponent was obviously no skilled assassin. I won’t say we were but…well, the Nasts weren’t training us for desk jobs. We all got private lessons with world-class instructors, who had determined the best mix to suit our personality and size. I got jujitsu and aikido, plus archery and marksmanship.
    My dad nearly had heart failure the first time he saw me fire a gun, but I embraced the lessons because our months on the run taught me I needed to be able to defend myself, by any means necessary.
    This fight was four average supernaturals against a benandanti, a werewolf and a mountain lion. Even without training, I think we could have taken them. Maya and Daniel had disabled their adversaries as soon as they heard the others coming. Then, Derek joined in, and I sat on Rae and relaxed as I listened for it to be over.
    “You’ve changed,” Rae said, her first words since Derek had captured her.
    “Uh-huh.”
    She tried to rise. I held her firmly, being clear that escape attempts would be frowned upon.
    “You’re as bad as he is now,” she said.
    “No, I’m as good as he is. Which doesn’t mean being able to fight makes me a better person. But I’ve adjusted to the situation, because the situation is unlikely to adjust to me.”
    “You’ve really changed.”
    I have. But Derek says I’m still the girl he fell for, because when he fell for me, I’d already been evolving. So had he, learning to be less angry with the world and more a part of the world. That doesn’t mean he’ll ever be a cheerful extrovert like Simon. No more than I’ll ever be a cold-hearted bitch like… Well, Tori’s not what I thought she was at Lyle House either. None of us are. A couple of adjectives can’t define anyone. In the right situation, I can be a cold-hearted bitch. Or at least I can play the role.
    “You don’t need to live like this,” Rae said. “Always on the run, always fighting.”
    “We don’t.”
    “Because you think you’ve found a safe place. Badger Lake. It’s not real. You know that, don’t you? It’s just brainwashing. They’ve convinced you that you’re happy.”
    “I am happy.”
    The words came without hesitation, and I paused after I said them. Was I happy? Yes. There’s part of me that feels I should be pacing like a caged lion, looking for a way to escape, but even Derek isn’t. That’s not brainwashing. We know we’re living in a cage, and we wouldn’t want to live there forever. But for now, it’s kind of like being in an amazing boarding school, and we know that’s intentional—Sean pampers us to show us how good Cabal life could be—but if we keep our eyes open to the truth, I think it’s okay to say “I’m happy.”
    Rae kept going on about brainwashing and the evil Cabals. I let her, because, as long as I didn’t argue, she thought I was listening and hoped I’d “escape” with her. I wasn’t listening, though. I was focused on the others as they disabled their attackers. The second the fighting stopped, the thump of running footfalls followed. Derek appeared in the alley mouth, blood on his T-shirt.
    “Not mine,” he said, catching my look of alarm.
    As he walked over, Daniel appeared, Maya beside him. Rae saw Maya and let out a shriek that had me scrambling to cover her mouth.
    “She’s with us,” I said. “She’s a skin-walker.”
    Rae’s expression said she had no idea what that was and didn’t really care, because there was a mountain lion padding straight for her. Maya surveyed me, looking for signs of injury. Then she lowered her head to peer at Rae. Her lip curled in a snarl, showing off fangs as big as my forefingers. She stretched out her oversized front paws, claws flicking out like switchblades. 
    Rae yelped. I tried not to chuckle. A wolf is an impressive sight, but a mountain lion at close range is terrifying, especially when she’s showing off her weaponry.
    Maya leaned against me, and I gave her a quick scratch behind the ears.