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to
sleep without one final look at him.

Chapter 3
Summer Loving
    In the weeks that followed, Angel tried to put all
her energy into completing her art coursework and
preparing for her final exams. She so wanted to do
well. Frank still insisted he wasn't going to fund
her. All her life he had drummed into her the
importance of not getting into debt and Angel
worried that if she took out a student loan, she
might never be able to repay it, especially doing a
subject as uncertain as art. Gemma had no such
worries. Her parents were going to pay for her to
do a beautician's course.
    'Your mum and dad are well tight,' Gemma told
her friend. 'Can't they see how talented you are?'
    Angel shrugged; the two of them had talked
about this so many times before, and there really
wasn't anything more to be said. Her parents were
never going to change their mind.
    But even though she was working hard, and when
she wasn't working she was off riding, she couldn't
help thinking of Cal. She frequently dreamt of him –
intense erotic dreams where he didn't push her
away. Now that she had kissed Cal, her desire for
him had increased so it was like a physical ache at
times. She tried to avoid going to places he was likely
to be, but Brighton wasn't that big a city and she
often saw him when she was out clubbing. He'd be
with Mel, who clamped herself to his arm and
wouldn't let him out of her sight, and even if Angel
was certain that he'd seen her, he never came over
and said hello, so she kept her distance.
    Angel and Gemma couldn't stand Mel. She was
always dressed head to toe in designer labels
because her property developer daddy was loaded
and always gave his little princess what she wanted.
Mel was no stunner and it took a lot of effort and
money to get her there. She went to the hairdresser's
twice a week to get her long blonde hair
blow-dried, she was permanently tanned because
she made frequent trips to a spray booth, her nails
were fake square-tipped French-manicured, her
teeth had been bleached and she was never seen
without full make-up. She was stick thin with large
boobs and although she denied it, Gemma and
Angel were convinced they were silicone. 'You just
can't be that skinny and have tits,' Gemma was fond
of pointing out. She and Cal had been together for
nearly a year and everyone knew that she was
desperate for him to marry her. Neither Gemma
nor Angel could understand what Cal saw in her
and questioned Tony at length to try and find out.
But Tony insisted she was gorgeous, what was their
problem?
    'It must be her big tits,' Gemma said to Angel.
'What else could it be?'
    'Well, it's not her personality, is it?' replied
Angel. Mel was the most uptight, high-maintenance
woman the girls had ever met, and Angel laughed,
imagining what it must be like going out with
someone like that. Actually, Angel did have a
theory about why Cal was with Mel, but it wasn't
one she really wanted to share with anyone, not
even Gemma. She believed Cal was with Mel
because her money represented success and
security to him. All his life Cal had struggled to
escape his own impoverished upbringing and put
as much distance as possible between his alcoholic
mother and himself. Being with Mel probably made
him feel safe and in control.
    'Perhaps she's really good at blow jobs,' Gemma
giggled.
    'Oh, come on, can you really imagine Her
Majesty going down on anyone? She'd be too
worried about smudging her make-up,' Angel
replied, exploding into giggles herself.
    'Oh my God, Angel,' Gemma managed to splutter
through her laughter. 'You actually cracked your
face!'
    It was true – since her birthday, when she'd got
off with Cal, Angel hadn't felt much like laughing.
But gradually the humiliation had worn off and
something good had come of the experience. It was
as if a light had been switched on inside her and
now, instead of wanting to wear shapeless clothes
that hid her body, Angel chose more revealing
outfits. She started to take more care over her
appearance