An Irish Country Doctor Read Online Free PDF Page B

wound down his window. "Hoosh on, cow. Hoosh. Hoosh."
    The animal lowered its head, emitted a single doleful moo, and budged not one inch.
    Barry sat back and watched O'Reilly to see just when the man's already demonstrated short fuse would burn down. O'Reilly dismounted, slammed the door, and walked to face the cow. "Look, cow, I'm in a hurry."
    "Moo," replied the cow.
    "Right," said O'Reilly. He took a horn in one hand and pulled. To Barry's amazement the beast took two paces forward, clearly unable to withstand the force being applied to its head. "Move your bloody self," O'Reilly roared.
    The cow flicked its ears, lowered its head, and skittered to the side of the road. O'Reilly climbed into the car, slammed it into gear, and took off with a screeching of rubber on tarmac. "Jesus Murphy," he said. "Animals. They're one of the delights of country practice. You just have to get used to dealing with them." 
    "All right," said Barry. "Fine." He was quite unaware of how soon Doctor O'Reilly's words would be shown to be true.
    O'Reilly grunted and then ground the gears. Barry listened to the grumbling of the engine as the rear tires whined and spun--and spun.
    "Bugger it," said O'Reilly. "We'll have to walk." He leant over, reached into the back seat, and grabbed his black bag and a pair of Wellington boots. "Out."
    Barry stepped out--and sank to his ankles in a sheugh. He hauled each foot loose from the mud and squelched to the lane's grassy verge. Blast! His shoes and best pants, already stained from the attentions of Arthur Guinness, were filthy. Barry wondered how much it would cost to have them dry-cleaned.
    He turned and stared at a farmhouse at the end of the rutted lane. "Is that where we're going, Fingal?"
    "Aye, that's the Kennedys' place."
    "Is there some other way to get there? My shoes ..."
    "Always bring wellies." O'Reilly pointed to his own footwear.
    "Don't worry about your shoes."
    "But these shoes cost--"
    "Christ Almighty! All right, we'll cut through the fields." Barry noticed just a hint of pallor in the tip of O'Reilly's nose. "Get a move on. The match starts in half an hour." O'Reilly hefted his bag, pushed open a rusting five-bar gate in the blackthorn hedge, and strode off. "Close the bloody gate after you," O'Reilly yelled over his shoulder.
    Barry struggled to haul the gate shut, scratching his hand on the wire loop that had to be used to secure the gate to the gatepost. He sucked his bleeding hand and stared at the ruin of his shoes--his only pair of good shoes. He heard O'Reilly yelling, "Is it today you were coming?"
    "Bugger off," Barry muttered, as he walked to where O'Reilly stood. The grass in the pasture was knee-deep, lush, feathered with seeds. And damp, very damp. As Barry walked purposefully ahead, he knew that the grass seeds would cling to his pant legs, and already he could feel his shins growing moist. Oh, well, he thought, at least the dew would wash off some of the mud.
    "What kept you?"
    "Doctor O'Reilly," Barry began, refusing to be intimidated, "I came as fast as I could--"
    "Huh."
    "And my shoes and pants are ruined."
    "What," asked O'Reilly, "do you know about pigs?"
    "I fail to see what pigs have to do with my clothes."
    "Suit yourself, but there's one coming." O'Reilly started to walk rapidly.
    Barry hesitated. Coming towards them was a pink something with the dimensions of a small hippopotamus. It had the same rolling gait as the African animal, but as Barry reckoned such beasts were rare round Ballybucklebo, the creature in question must be a pig, and its eyes--he could see them now that it was appreciably closer--were red and distinctly malevolent. Barry set off at a canter in pursuit of O'Reilly and caught up with him halfway between the gate and the end of the field. "It is a pig."
    "Brilliant," said O'Reilly, lengthening his stride. "I've read somewhere that domesticated boars can turn ugly."
    "Ugly?"
    "Right." O'Reilly was breathing heavily. "Bloody big teeth."