English essay to do by tomorrow morning.
JACK
Right. So, the only sound I want to hear coming through the ceiling this afternoon is the sound of sweat dripping onto textbooks.
JENNY
Cello?
JACK
No cello.
JENNY
I thought we agreed that cello was my interest or hobby.
JACK
Well, it already is your interest or hobby. So when they ask you at the Oxford interview ‘What is your interest or hobby?’ you can say, ‘The cello’ and you wouldn’t be lying. But you don’t have to practise a hobby. A hobby is a hobby.
JENNY
Can I stop going to the youth orchestra, then?
JACK
No, no, no. The youth orchestra’s a good thing. Shows you’re a joiner-inner.
JENNY
Ah.Yes. But. I’ve already joined in. So now I can stop.
JACK
No, no. Well, that just shows the opposite, don’t you see? That shows you’re a rebel. They don’t want that at Oxford.
JENNY
No. They don’t want people who think for themselves.
JACK
( missing the sarcasm, as is his wont )
’Course they don’t.
4 INTERIOR: SCHOOL HALL - DAY
JENNY with cello sits in the string section. Everyone is getting settled, tuning up, latecomers still arriving. Along the row from JENNY , tuning his violin, is a nice-looking boy of her age, GRAHAM , and she waves at him.Two thirteen-year-old boys sitting between them wave, too, parodically, and then blow kisses, much to GRAHAM’S embarrassment and JENNY’S fury.
The silly boys dissolve in fits of giggles: this is clearly one of the funniest moments of their lives - until one of them farts noisily and, it would appear from all the frantic gesturing, pungently. The comic value of the fart tops even the comic value of the wave, and they are scarcely able to stay seated, such is their mirth.
5 EXTERIOR: SCHOOL - DAY
JENNY and GRAHAM are talking while he struggles to take his bike out of a bicycle rack, slightly unbalanced by the violin strapped to his back. GRAHAM is ner vous, chronically unconfident and shy.
GRAHAM
Should I wear, you know, Sunday best?
JENNY
You’d better, I’m afraid. Just to show my father you’re un jeune homme serieux , not a teddy boy.
GRAHAM
Oh, God.
JENNY
( looking up at the sky )
I’m going to go. It’s going to bucket down in a minute.
GRAHAM
Oh, OK, right . . .
JENNY
I’ll see you at the weekend.
GRAHAM
Bye, then.
JENNY
Bye.
They move at the same time and bump awkwardly into each other.
JENNY/GRAHAM
Sorry.
The two silly boys from before are sitting on the school wall and start to blow more kisses.
SMALLER BOY 1
Goodbye, my love!
GRAHAM blushes as he and JENNY head off in opposite directions.
6 EXTERIOR: BUS STOP - DAY
The rain has begun. JENNY attempts to cover herself. A mother pushing a pram and holding the hand of her little boy crosses the road in front of her, and a beautiful, sleek red sports car - a Bristol - stops to let them across. DAVID , possibly in his mid-thirties, dapper, and almost but not quite handsome, is driving the car. DAVID , distracted, impatient, spots JENNY at the bus stop.
In front of the car a small Wellington boot drops off the foot of the boy, further slowing down their painfully slow progress across the road.
JENNY is wet. DAVID makes eye contact. JENNY smiles ruefully and enchantingly. Once the mother and boy have crossed the road, DAVID pulls the car over by the bus stop and rolls the window of the Bristol down.
DAVID
Hello.
JENNY ignores him.
Look. If you’ve any sense, you wouldn’t take a lift from a strange man.
JENNY smiles thinly.
But I’m a music lover, and I’m worried about your cello. So what I propose is, you put it in the car and walk alongside me.
JENNY
How do I know you won’t just drive off with the cello?
DAVID
Ah. Good point. How much does a new cello cost? Ten pounds? Fifteen? I don’t know. Let’s say fifteen.
He pulls out a wallet, takes out three five-pound notes, hands them to her.
JENNY laughs
JACK
Right. So, the only sound I want to hear coming through the ceiling this afternoon is the sound of sweat dripping onto textbooks.
JENNY
Cello?
JACK
No cello.
JENNY
I thought we agreed that cello was my interest or hobby.
JACK
Well, it already is your interest or hobby. So when they ask you at the Oxford interview ‘What is your interest or hobby?’ you can say, ‘The cello’ and you wouldn’t be lying. But you don’t have to practise a hobby. A hobby is a hobby.
JENNY
Can I stop going to the youth orchestra, then?
JACK
No, no, no. The youth orchestra’s a good thing. Shows you’re a joiner-inner.
JENNY
Ah.Yes. But. I’ve already joined in. So now I can stop.
JACK
No, no. Well, that just shows the opposite, don’t you see? That shows you’re a rebel. They don’t want that at Oxford.
JENNY
No. They don’t want people who think for themselves.
JACK
( missing the sarcasm, as is his wont )
’Course they don’t.
4 INTERIOR: SCHOOL HALL - DAY
JENNY with cello sits in the string section. Everyone is getting settled, tuning up, latecomers still arriving. Along the row from JENNY , tuning his violin, is a nice-looking boy of her age, GRAHAM , and she waves at him.Two thirteen-year-old boys sitting between them wave, too, parodically, and then blow kisses, much to GRAHAM’S embarrassment and JENNY’S fury.
The silly boys dissolve in fits of giggles: this is clearly one of the funniest moments of their lives - until one of them farts noisily and, it would appear from all the frantic gesturing, pungently. The comic value of the fart tops even the comic value of the wave, and they are scarcely able to stay seated, such is their mirth.
5 EXTERIOR: SCHOOL - DAY
JENNY and GRAHAM are talking while he struggles to take his bike out of a bicycle rack, slightly unbalanced by the violin strapped to his back. GRAHAM is ner vous, chronically unconfident and shy.
GRAHAM
Should I wear, you know, Sunday best?
JENNY
You’d better, I’m afraid. Just to show my father you’re un jeune homme serieux , not a teddy boy.
GRAHAM
Oh, God.
JENNY
( looking up at the sky )
I’m going to go. It’s going to bucket down in a minute.
GRAHAM
Oh, OK, right . . .
JENNY
I’ll see you at the weekend.
GRAHAM
Bye, then.
JENNY
Bye.
They move at the same time and bump awkwardly into each other.
JENNY/GRAHAM
Sorry.
The two silly boys from before are sitting on the school wall and start to blow more kisses.
SMALLER BOY 1
Goodbye, my love!
GRAHAM blushes as he and JENNY head off in opposite directions.
6 EXTERIOR: BUS STOP - DAY
The rain has begun. JENNY attempts to cover herself. A mother pushing a pram and holding the hand of her little boy crosses the road in front of her, and a beautiful, sleek red sports car - a Bristol - stops to let them across. DAVID , possibly in his mid-thirties, dapper, and almost but not quite handsome, is driving the car. DAVID , distracted, impatient, spots JENNY at the bus stop.
In front of the car a small Wellington boot drops off the foot of the boy, further slowing down their painfully slow progress across the road.
JENNY is wet. DAVID makes eye contact. JENNY smiles ruefully and enchantingly. Once the mother and boy have crossed the road, DAVID pulls the car over by the bus stop and rolls the window of the Bristol down.
DAVID
Hello.
JENNY ignores him.
Look. If you’ve any sense, you wouldn’t take a lift from a strange man.
JENNY smiles thinly.
But I’m a music lover, and I’m worried about your cello. So what I propose is, you put it in the car and walk alongside me.
JENNY
How do I know you won’t just drive off with the cello?
DAVID
Ah. Good point. How much does a new cello cost? Ten pounds? Fifteen? I don’t know. Let’s say fifteen.
He pulls out a wallet, takes out three five-pound notes, hands them to her.
JENNY laughs
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