All Together Dead Read Online Free PDF Page B

real quick, so none of her witch friends could track her down. Amelia was in a bit of hot water with the witch community of the Big Easy.
    “She sure loves that cat of hers,” Elmer Claire said. “She had that big old tom at the vet the other day when I took Powderpuff in.” Powderpuff, Elmer Claire’s white Persian, was about a million years old. “I asked her why she didn’t get that cat neutered, and she just covered that cat’s ears like he could hear me, and she asked me not to talk about it in front of Bob, just like he was a person.”
    “She’s real fond of Bob,” I said, not quite knowing whether I wanted to gag or laugh at the idea of the vet neutering Bob.
    “You know that Amelia how?” Maxine asked.
    “You remember my cousin Hadley?”
    Everyone in the room nodded, except newcomer Halleigh and her mother.
    “Well, when Hadley lived in New Orleans, she rented the upstairs of Amelia’s house from her,” I said. “And when Hadley passed away”—here there were solemn nods all around—“I went down to New Orleans to clean out Hadley’s things. And I met Amelia, and we became friends, and she just decided she’d visit Bon Temps for a while.”
    All the ladies looked at me with the most expectant expressions, as if they couldn’t wait to hear what would come next. Because there had to be more explanation, right?
    There was indeed a lot more to the story, but I didn’t think they were ready to hear that Amelia, after a night of great loving, had accidentally turned Bob into a cat during a sexual experiment. I’d never asked Amelia to describe the circumstances, because I was pretty sure I didn’t want to get a visual on that scene. But they were all waiting for a little more explanation. Any explanation.
    “Amelia had a bad breakup with her boyfriend,” I said, keeping my tone low and confidential.
    All the other ladies’ faces were both titillated and sympathetic.
    “He was a Mormon missionary,” I told them. Well, Bob had looked like a Mormon missionary, in dark slacks and a white short-sleeved shirt, and he’d even arrived at Amelia’s on a bicycle. He was actually a witch, like Amelia. “But he knocked on Amelia’s door and they just fell in love.” Actually, into bed. But you know—same thing, for the purposes of this story.
    “Did his parents know?”
    “Did his church find out?”
    “Don’t they get to have more than one wife?”
    The questions crowded in too thick for me to deal with, and I waited until the attendees had subsided into their waiting mode again. I was not used to making up fabrications, and I was running out of truth to base the rest of the story on. “I really don’t know much about the Mormon church,” I told the last questioner, and that was the absolute truth. “Though I think modern Mormons aren’t supposed to have more than one wife. But what happened to them was his relatives found out and got real mad because they didn’t think Amelia was good enough for the man, and they snatched him away and made him go home. So she wanted to leave New Orleans to get a change of scene, forget about the past, you know.”
    They all nodded, absolutely fascinated by Amelia’s big drama. I felt a twinge of guilt. For a minute or two, everyone gave her opinion about the sad story. Maxine Fortenberry summed it all up.
    “Poor girl,” said Maxine. “He should’ve stood up to them.”
    I passed Halleigh another present to open. “Halleigh, you know that won’t happen to you,” I said, diverting the conversation back to its proper topic. “Andy is just nuts about you; anyone can tell.”
    Halleigh blushed, and her mother said, “We all love Andy,” and the shower was back on track. The rest of the conversation veered from the wedding to the meals each church was taking in turn to cook for the evacuees. The Catholics had tomorrow night, and Maxine sounded a little relieved when she said the number to cook for had dropped to twenty-five.
    As I drove home