All In: Raising the Stakes Read Online Free PDF Page B

a good mood tonight."
    I give a noncommittal shrug even though we both know it's bullshit. On the inside I'm giddier than I was the night I finally lost my virginity. There was no time for dating until I got to college. When I had free time instead of working my ass off for the first time in my life, I started going to the campus gym and working out. Within a few weeks I was suddenly an actual blip on girls' radar. They began approaching me, even though I was a poor, socially awkward dork with my nose always in a book even when I was running on the treadmill. It was intimidating, having never even made out with anyone, when suddenly this girl Sara took me back to my car and fucked me after our first date at the movie theater. I was a fumbling idiot, not knowing what or how to touch her. I busted a nut before she could sit all the way down on my cock. My mind was blown. All I knew was that I liked it and wanted more. Even at eighteen, I hadn't spent much time masturbating. It was hard to find the time between school and work. When my head hit the pillow for a few hours each night, I was usually too exhausted to even think about jerking off. 
    Sara was thankfully patient and didn't laugh at my inexperience. She probably felt sorry for me. We dated the whole first semester of my freshman year until she went home during the Christmas break and got back together with her high school boyfriend. The only time in my life that I actually felt...connected to another human being was when I was intimate with her. So when she broke up with me, I was crushed. I didn't date anyone else for months because I couldn't imagine going through that shit all over again. Actually, that was my last –“normal” long-term relationship. The only one before the threesome I have with Lacy and Will, and the secret affair with a man.
    So yeah, even though Katie's still completely out of reach, it felt good to be able to talk to her and help her out today, showing her I'm not the asshole she thinks I am. Hell, it's great to have any sort of interaction with her even when she hurls her feisty insults at me. But I'm not getting my hopes up that she'll ever actually give me a chance. The hope is always there, just now I'm trying to be more realistic.
    "Mind if I stay tonight?" Chad asks, snapping me back to the present. The one where I'm naked, taking a shower with a man. 
    "Aren't you worried someone might see your car in my driveway?" I counter, even though I don't mind him sleeping here. He hasn’t in months, not since that one weekend with Lacy and Will. We’ve both spent several weekends with them down in Charlotte.                
    "You don't have any neighbors."
    "True." The closest residence is half a mile back toward town. "I don't have to spoon with you, do I?" I tease. "And Lacy always gave me shower blowjobs the mornings after she stayed with me."
    "No spooning required, only forking," he replies with a smirk. "And I'll blow you in the morning, but from now on, every time I suck your dick, you have to fuck me."
    "What?" I exclaim, slicking my wet hair back off my face. "No way."
    "It's called quid pro quo, fucker. I've tried to be patient and not rush you before you were ready, but admit it, you wanted to fuck me tonight and you liked it. You know I liked it. So what's the problem? It's time for you to stop half-assing this shit. No pun intended."
    I run my palms over my face, wiping the water away from my eyes while trying to figure out my response. "Yes, I...liked it, but I wasn't planning for this to be a repeat occurrence. Or long term."
    "Hell, I wasn't either," he says, bracing his back against his side of the shower. "But as long as I'm not seeing anyone, and you're not seeing anyone, then why not fuck instead of watch reruns of shit shows when we hang out every night?"
    "I miss having a woman," I say honestly.
    "Fuck man, I do too." He laughs. "At least Lacy would blow me. We should go to Charlotte this weekend. Is it