Afloat and Ashore Read Online Free PDF

off to sea clandestinely, and returning when I was
ready. If I ever was to make a sailor, no time was to be lost; for all
with whom he had conversed assured him the period of life when such
things were best learned, was between sixteen and twenty. This I
thought probable enough, and I parted from my friend with a promise of
conversing further with him on the subject at an early opportunity.
    I am almost ashamed to confess that Rupert's artful sophism nearly
blinded my eyes to the true distinction between right and wrong. If
Mr. Hardinge really felt himself bound by my father's wishes to
educate me for the bar, and my own repugnance to the profession was
unconquerable, why should I not relieve him from the responsibility at
once by assuming the right to judge for myself, and act accordingly?
So far as Mr. Hardinge was concerned, I had little difficulty in
coming to a conclusion, though the profound deference I still felt for
my father's wishes, and more especially for those of my sainted
mother, had a hold on my heart, and an influence on my conduct, that
was not so easily disposed of. I determined to have a frank
conversation with Mr. Hardinge, therefore, in order to ascertain how
far either of my parents had expressed anything that might be
considered obligatory on me. My plan went as far as to reveal my own
desire to be a sailor, and to see the world, but not to let it be
known that I might go off without his knowledge, as this would not be
so absolutely relieving the excellent divine "from all responsibility
in the premises," as was contemplated in the scheme of his own son.
    An opportunity soon occurred, when I broached the subject by asking
Mr. Hardinge whether my father, in his will, had ordered that I should
be sent to Yale, and there be educated for the bar. He had done
nothing of the sort. Had he left any particular request, writing, or
message on the subject, at all? Not that Mr. Hardinge knew. It is
true, the last had heard his friend, once or twice, make some general
remark which would lead one to suppose that Captain Wallingford had
some vague expectations I might go to the bar, but nothing further. My
mind felt vastly relieved by these admissions, for I knew my mother's
tenderness too well to anticipate that she would dream of absolutely
dictating in a matter that was so clearly connected with my own
happiness and tastes. When questioned on this last point, Mr. Hardinge
did not hesitate to say that my mother had conversed with him several
times concerning her views, as related to my career in life. She
wished me to go to Yale, and then to read law, even though I did not
practise. As soon as this, much was said, the conscientious servant
of God paused, to note the effect on me. Reading disappointment in my
countenance, I presume, he immediately added, "But your mother, Miles,
laid no restraint on you; for she knew it was
you
who was to
follow the career, and not herself. 'I should as soon think of
commanding whom he was to marry, as to think of forcing, a profession
on him,' she added. 'He is the one who is to decide this, and he only.
We may try to guide and influence him, but not go beyond this. I leave
you, dear sir, to do all you think best in this matter, certain that
your own wisdom will be aided by the providence of a kind Master.'"
    I now plainly told Mr. Hardinge my desire to see the world, and to be
a sailor. The divine was astounded at this declaration, and I saw that
he was grieved. I believe some religious objections were connected
with his reluctance to consent to my following the sea, as a
calling. At any rate, it was easy to discover that these objections
were lasting and profound. In that day, few Americans travelled, by
way of an accomplishment, at all; and those few belonged to a class in
society so much superior to mine, as to render it absurd to think of
sending, me abroad with similar views. Nor would my fortune justify
such an expenditure. I was well enough off to be a comfortable and
free