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deep breath. “OK. Don’t kill me, but I have news about Teddy.”
    I felt a thud in the pit of my stomach at the mere mention of my ex-husband’s name. Feigningbravery, I sat up and popped a lozenge into my mouth. “Go ahead.”
    “You know my cousin Eric is Facebook friends with Teddy, right? They have connections throughwork or something.”
    Already I didn’t like where this was going.
    “Yeah?” I said.
    “Well, Eric told me that Teddy announced he’s getting a divorce and changed his relationshipstatus to single.”
    I jerked so forcefully that I tipped the popcorn bowl over. “A   divorce ?” Georgie nodded his headslowly. My mouth hung open, jaw momentarily frozen, before I followed with, “When did this happen?”
    “You mean, when did he make the announcement, or when did I find out?”
    I didn’t bother to clarify.
    Considering one of the reasons why Teddy and I split up was because he cheated on me, this newsshouldn’t have surprised me. But it did. Floored me, in fact. Teddy had been so hell-bent on being a dad
    —and not just any ol’ dad, but Father of the Year. That included a stable marriage—or, as he called it, “a solid family unit.” He and Ramona had lasted way longer than we had, and they had two children.
    How was I supposed to feel about this? I wondered. Considering he’d left me for Ramona, was this some kind of karma? Had the gods finally delivered on my jilted heart’s desire for their marriage vows to be sealed in the Temple of Doom? It sucked that my own relationship status had remained unchanged all this time, but I suspected that even if I had been blissfully remarried by now, the news still would have thrown me for just as much of a loop.
    Georgie hesitated while Spandau Ballet’s “True” blared in the background of Molly Ringwald’s own love life problems.
    “There’s more.”
    I groaned. “Oh, for fuck’s sake, what else?”
    “He mentioned you in the comment thread.”
    My eyes reduced to slits, and Georgie handed me a pillow in self-defense; clearly he could tell Iwanted to hit something, and he didn’t want it to be the messenger. I clutched and squeezed the pillowwhile I said through clenched teeth, “What did he say?”
    “I don’t know, but Eric said the word   spinster   was in there.”
    Theo nervously eyed all the breakables in the room.

    No. Teddy knew the rules. He was not to use my name, post photos, etcetera, in public ever again.
    “Theo wasn’t sure if I should tell you,” said Georgie, “but I thought you were better off hearing itfrom me than some loser.”
    I darted my eyes to Theo. “You knew about this?”
    “For consultation purposes,” she clarified in an effort to stave off my death glare.
    My eyes darted back to Georgie. “I would’ve been better off hearing it from Teddy—no, scratchthat. I shouldn’t be hearing it at all.”
    “He was probably drunk when he posted it,” said Theo.
    “Like the last time?” I asked, raising my voice.
    I stared at the TV without actually watching it while my memory bank reopened the Teddy account. We had met during my junior year of college at a party following a basketball game. He was a year olderthan me and quite good-looking. Blond hair, blue eyes, tall, preppy... think the guy that was in   The Karate Kid   and   Back to School   and all those eighties movies—you know, the one who always played the tool. That right there should’ve tipped me off. He wasn’t really my type, but I assumed the alcohol was thereason for our hitting it off.
    Although we flirted all night and even made out a little bit, nothing came of it. Not until almost fiveyears later, shortly after I broke up with another guy. Teddy came into Whitford’s to purchase a bunch of Dr. Seuss books for his niece. Something about that touched me. I was still working on the floor andbehind the cash wrap in those days, and the moment we saw each other, sparks flew—literally. One of theoverhead