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claiming they had created life on Earth with a kit they bought from their local hardware store.
    They had just wanted to see what would happen.
    ‘I haven’t seen the Badde file,’ Nicki said.
    ‘There isn’t much to see,’ Blake told her. ‘But I’ve got a current photo of him.’
    ‘Blake, darling,’ Sally groaned. ‘Not the photo.’
    But he’d already brought it up on the internal monitor.
    Nicki stared. ‘It’s a picture of an elbow,’ she said.
    ‘I know it’s an elbow! I’ve been showing that photo around for fifteen years and it’s gotten me nowhere!’
    ‘That’s a pretty nasty-looking elbow. Maybe people are afraid to ID him.’
    Blake rubbed his unshaven chin. ‘This whole extortion gig is new for Badde,’ he said, thoughtfully. ‘It’s the one thing I don’t understand. Why do it? It’s not his style.’
    ‘Do you think he’ll really use the Super-EMP?’
    ‘I don’t know. The Earth might never recover if he does.’
    ‘What would people do without power?’
    Blake shrugged. ‘It could be a good thing,’ he said. ‘They would do what people used to do in olden times.’
    ‘Like what? Die from leprosy?’
    ‘People would get to know their families. Start talking to their neighbours. Read books. Be active in their communities.’
    ‘That’s the biggest load of sprot I’ve ever heard,’ Nicki said. ‘It’s pure nostalgia, like that song from the Sunbarrows.’
    ‘Who?’
    ‘They’re a retro group. They write new lyrics to old songs, add a drumbeat and synthesiser. Their song ‘What’s So Good About Now?’ is sung to the ancient tune of ‘Oh, You Beautiful Doll’.’
    ‘I don’t know it.’
    ‘It goes like this,’ Nicki said, and sang it:
    What’s so good about now?
    What’s so good about now?
    Spaceships, plastics, teleportation ,
    Cloning, face swaps, biodegration.
    What’s so good about now?
    What’s so good about now?
    We’ve got cryogenics and time machines ,
    Terraforming and aging creams.
    Now! Now! Now! Now!
    What’s so good about now?
    Blake sighed.
    Exactly what I needed , he thought. A singing toaster.

6
    Nicki was relieved to see Blake navigating through the traffic without crashing. He had one or two near misses, but he was a surprisingly good driver considering he didn’t use the onboard AI.
    Once they’d arrived at PBI headquarters, Blake and Nicki took the elevator to the main concourse, which was crammed with members of the public wanting to file reports. Blake pointed to a statue at one end of the service desk. It was a heavily bearded three-breasted woman with a blaster in one hand and handcuffs in the other, set on a three-foot-high pedestal.
    ‘Simone de Chargette,’ he said. ‘The PBI’s first—’
    ‘—Commissioner of Police. Born 2232, died 2274in a gun battle against the lunar mafia.’
    ‘You know your history.’
    ‘I’m familiar with the entire history of the PBI. Actually, I’m familiar with the history of almost everything.’
    ‘You know what that makes you sound like?’
    ‘A smart cyborg?’
    ‘Something like that.’
    They managed to push their way through the crowds until they finally reached the staff entrance at the far end.
    ‘You got a badge?’ Blake asked Nicki.
    ‘Of course I’ve got a badge.’ When will this guy get with the program? she wondered.
    Nicki had come across prejudice every day of her life. Everyone she met thought she was a robot, but it couldn’t be that way with Blake. She had to work with him.
    A guard held up a hand as they approached the barriers.
    ‘What is it?’ Nicki demanded. ‘You’re going to point out that I’m carrying metal?’
    ‘Robots have their own entrance.’
    ‘I’m not a robot,’ Nicki said, showing him her ID. ‘I’m a cyborg.’
    ‘What’s that? A religion?’
    Sighing, she explained that she was, in fact, nine per cent human.
    ‘I don’t know,’ the guard said. ‘I don’t think that counts.’
    ‘How much does it take to be