A Small Country Read Online Free PDF

instance. Not around here, anyway.’
    ‘I don’t suppose it would help you that much if you could.’
    ‘Yes it would. One doesn’t like to feel a freak. The family is sacred in these parts.’
    ‘You make fun of the way your mother talks about Wales; no cases for the assize courts, “the land of white gloves”, and so on; now you’re as bad.’
    ‘I suppose I am. It’s shaken me, Edward, I can tell you that.’
    ‘Of course it has. It’s shaken me too. I feel more sorry than I can say.’
    For a time they sat in silence. Then realizing how late it was getting, Tom rose to his feet.
    ‘Are you mowing with me tomorrow?’
    ‘Rather. “Killing the hay”, as Miss Rees says.’
    ‘I’ll give you a call, then, at five, and we’ll start on the slaughter.’
    ‘I may not answer the call, old man. Not at five. The harvest is truly plentiful but the labourers are not all ready by five o’clock —I’ll probably get up at about seven and then have an hour with Catrin, collecting the eggs. That’s a job I’d leave home for, that is.’
    ‘For God’s sake, Ned, leave the girl alone this time. Leave her alone, for God’s sake.’
    ‘You mean her mind, I take it. A quick kiss and a cuddle, you wouldn’t mind that?’
    ‘Don’t be an idiot, Ned. It’s your subversive talk I’m afraid of. You know that very well.’
    ‘We’re both idiots, then.... What’s the matter? I’m not serious.’
    ‘I know that. No I was simply thinking about all the talking we’ve done in the last couple of years; enough for a lifetime, wouldn’t you say? You know, I don’t think I’ll be coming back to Oxford next year.’
    ‘We’ll think about that again, old man. You can’t make a decision like that after a long day in the hay-field. We’ll talk again.’
    Tom lit a small lamp for Edward and took him upstairs.
    When he came downstairs he re-read the letter several times.
    He had always idolized his father, had always felt such pride in his good looks and vitality, his unsought popularity everywhere; he was one of those people whose presence seemed to enliven any gathering; his laugh infectious.
    If there was any singing anywhere, he would soon be singing loudly as anyone, making up words if he didn’t know them; never at a loss.
    He could remember listening to him when he was a small boy tucked up in bed, the sad, old songs, the break in his voice. ’Twas I who watched the ripening wheat, another has the harvest. How desolate those words had made him, he’d had no idea that they referred to a woman, he was a farmer even then, it was the wheat he’d cared about, the precious harvest. But not his father, obviously.
    He tried to remember Miss Lewis, Rhydfelen School, he’d seen her often enough at local gatherings. Small and insignificant he’d always thought her. A delicate, oval face, to be fair, a pretty way of holding herself; she certainly didn’t look thirty.
    And his father thought he loved her and their child. Tom felt a sudden pang of jealousy, a physical pain in his chest, to think that his father had now, perhaps, another son who would trail about after him. Catrin had never counted.
    ‘Poor Mother,’ he said to himself, ‘if I can feel this.’

FOUR

    Catrin found Edward still in the breakfast-room when she got down next morning. Miss Rees standing at the door keeping him company. It was a still, silvery morning, doves murmuring from the huge chestnut trees outside the windows.
    ‘How is your mother today?’
    There was a pause before Catrin replied. It was as though she was giving the question grave consideration. In fact she was savouring the moment; the smile, the friendliness, the June morning.
    ‘She doesn’t talk to me. It’s only Nano she wants.’
    ‘She thinks of you as a child, that’s all. She’s trying to protect you.’
    Catrin looked at him gratefully, wondering if he could be right. It was a thing she hadn’t considered.
    ‘When may I go up to see her?’
    Catrin looked