A Perfect Match Read Online Free PDF

and judging by his slight prickliness he was expecting some strong, uninformed reactions – he knew his family all too well. He was clearly planning to educate us all on Persian affairs.
    ‘Well, good for them,’ I said. ‘So how long have you guys been dating?’
    ‘Nearly three months.’
    ‘ What? I’ve been on the phone to you loads of times and you never mentioned it.’
    ‘I wanted to see if it was going anywhere before I said anything. I’m not expecting Mum to react too well to the fact that she’s not Catholic, Irish or even European.’
    ‘Initially I’d focus on the fact that she’s a teacher and then break the rest of it to her gently. She’ll be fine, she’ll just be delighted to see you so happy,’ I lied.
    We drove straight to the restaurant where Mum, Dad, Babs and James were waiting for us. Babs was wearing what can only be described as a belt and a plunging top which left nothing to the imagination. Mum was hissing at her through a fixed smile, which wasn’t very effective. She looked like she had a bad case of lockjaw.
    ‘You look like a cheap hussy. This is a respectable restaurant, could you not have worn something decent.’
    Babs rolled her eyes. ‘You have to flaunt it while you’ve got it.’
    ‘Hi, Seabiscuit,’ said Sean, leaning down to kiss Babs while the rest of us tried to keep a straight face.
    ‘What’s a seabiscuit?’ asked Mum, at which point I thought James was going to choke on his drink.
    ‘It’s a stupid racehorse with a big nose. Sean thinks he’s a fucking comedian,’ said a very grumpy Babs.
    Mum threw her head back and roared laughing.
    Dad, James and Sean then launched into a detailed discussion about the Leinster rugby team’s chances of winning the European cup under James’s guidance, and dissected every player on the team. Babs then got into a strop because it was her night and they were all talking about rugby. I, on the other hand, was relieved the conversation was about rugby and not Sean’s love life. But eventually Mum interrupted and asked Sean how work and things were going.
    ‘Good, thanks. I’ve met a great girl actually. She’s a teacher, she teaches maths.’
    ‘God, I’d say she’s a barrel of laughs,’ said Babs.
    ‘How lovely,’ said Mum. ‘A teacher, isn’t that wonderful, Dan?’
    ‘Great news,’ said Dad.
    ‘Tell us all. What’s her name? How long have you been seeing her?’ asked Mum.
    ‘I’ve been seeing her for about three months now. Her name’s Shadee.’
    ‘Shireen?’
    ‘No, Shadee.’
    Welsh?’ asked Dad.
    ‘No, Scottish I’d say,’ said Mum.
    ‘Neither,’ said Sean.
    ‘Sounds more Asian … ouch!’ said James as I kicked him under the table.
    ‘It is. She’s Persian,’ said Sean, throwing himself in head first.
    ‘What’s Persian?’ said Mum, looking confused and a little concerned.
    ‘Persia is Iran,’ said Dad, looking decidedly worried.
    ‘It’s OK, she doesn’t wear the gear and she was born and bred in England,’ I jumped in, trying to break the tension.
    ‘You have to go to Iran to find a girlfriend and you’ve the cheek to slag me about my nose,’ said Babs, stirring it up as usual.
    ‘There was a super bloke in school with me from Iran – Johnny Naser. He was six foot five, but a real gentle giant, great batsman too,’ said James, trying to help ease the tension and failing miserably.
    ‘She considers herself half English half Iranian,’ said Sean tersely.
    ‘Is she … ah … religious?’ said Dad, cutting to the chase.
    ‘No, but her parents are Muslim and she respects the values of the Muslim faith.’
    ‘Iran,’ said Mum. ‘Did I see a film about Iran?’
    I was hoping she hadn’t seen Not Without My Daughter.
    ‘Lord,’ said Mum, wide-eyed. ‘I did see a film about Iran and poor Sally Field was trapped there with her daughter and the husband was an awful fellow and he seemed very normal at first. Oh yes, in America he was very charming and then once he