A Mother's Secret Read Online Free PDF Page B

hand. “Just go say hello.”
    Joshua eyed his mother. “I can’t go talk to her now. I need to get home and feed the horses.” His mother opened her mouth to speak, and he raised his finger. “I told you I will go to a social. Please don’t push this. You know I don’t like to be pressured into things.”
    “Okay, okay.” She nodded. “That will be just fine.”
    “I’ll see you both later. I’m going to head home.” Joshua shook his father’s hand and gave his mother a quick hug before climbing into the buggy.
    He guided the horse out to the main road while thinking about his mother. He loved her, but sometimes he wished she would concentrate on something else. She’d always pressured him to find someone and get married, but lately it seemed to be her one focus, her one goal in life.
    He was certain her heart was broken after Hannah chose to leave and take Amanda and Andrew away from the Amish church. And in some ways, it made sense that she hoped Joshua could provide more grandchildren to help heal the hole in her heart. Yet, at the same time, he wasn’t focused on finding a wife and starting a family. He wanted to run the best horse farm he could in honor of Gideon’s memory. Finding a wife didn’t fit in with his plans right now. He was too busy to date, but his mother wasn’t known for taking no for an answer.
    Joshua considered Lena while he merged onto another road, heading toward his farm. She looked to be a nice enough younglady. He was certain his mother wouldn’t stop nagging him until he attended a social and met her, but he’d only told her he would to get her to drop the subject. Joshua had no intention of attending a social with the rest of the older single folks in his church district. If he were meant to meet Lena Esh, then God would place her in his path. If his mother asked about the social, he’d simply tell her he was too busy and he’d try again the following week. She would have to accept that answer for now. He prayed she would find something else to occupy her time and take her focus off Joshua’s life.
    He turned onto his street and made his way toward his horse farm. Soon the sign advertising Glick’s Belgian and Dutch Harness Horses came into view and Joshua thought again about Gideon. He missed his older brother and thought of him nearly every day as he walked out to the stables, thinking of how Gideon would be pleased if he could witness how busy and successful the farm had become during the past few years.
    Joshua guided the horse up the rock driveway and past the two-story, white clapboard house where he now lived. It was the house where Gideon had brought Hannah after they were married and then welcomed his three children. The house seemed too big and too empty for only Joshua, but it made sense for him to move onto the farm after Hannah left.
    He climbed down from the buggy, unhitched the horse, and led it toward the stable while thinking about his life. He knew God intended him to stay on the farm after Gideon died, and for a long time he believed God intended for him and Hannah to be together.
    As he stepped into the stable, he pondered what life would be like if he had a wife and a family. He pushed the thoughts away,knowing he didn’t have time to find a wife. Dreaming about it was crazy. He was where he needed to be. After all, he was nearly forty and still single. Maybe God didn’t intend for everyone to be married.
    Yet deep in his heart, he wondered if there was more for him than his lonely life on the horse farm.

    Later that evening, Barbie checked to make sure the back door was locked before heading to bed.
    “ Mammi .” Lillian walked through the kitchen clad in her long nightgown. “I thought you had already gone to bed.”
    “I was heading that way.” She watched her granddaughter place a book in her tote bag. “Are you getting ready for school tomorrow?”
    “ Ya .” Lillian yawned and stretched her arms. “I had fun at youth group today. We