A Most Unpleasant Wedding Read Online Free PDF

of his pajamas, pulled out an insect, held it out. “What do you think this is, Margaret?”
    She squinted in the dim light. “I think it’s a pillbug.”
    â€œHow am I supposed to sleep with all of these insects crawling over me?”
    She took the bug from him, released it into a corner of the tent. “They’re just innocent denizens of the soil. We have a net to keep the mosquitoes off.”
    He started to crawl out of his sleeping bag. “Let’s go home.”
    â€œWe just got here.” She gave him a reproachful look. “This isn’t about the insects. You like insects. You just don’t like being away from the front desk.” She snuggled up to him. “Rudley, it’s wonderful here. The clean, earthy fragrance of the forest carpet, the crickets chirping, the owls hooting, the brook gurgling over its rock bed.”
    â€œWe could get that from the back porch.”
    â€œPrivacy. We can’t get that from the back porch.”
    He thought about that for a moment, smiled. “I have to admit you’re right about that, Margaret. No Lloyd sneaking up on me, depriving me of two years of life, no Gregoire nagging me over cilantro and fennel root. No Aunt Pearl suffocating me with her whisky fumes.”
    She sighed. “Alone at last.”
    He plucked a slug from his arm. “Virtually.”
    A twig snapped.
    Rudley froze, slug poised.
    â€œIt is us.”
    Rudley sighed. “Come.”
    The tent flap opened. Tim poked his head in. Gregoire hovered at his shoulder.
    â€œWe’re not here,” Rudley said. “We’re camping in Algonquin Park.”
    Tim ignored him. “Shall I take away the supper dishes?”
    â€œPlease.”
    â€œDid you enjoy the trout?” Gregoire asked.
    â€œExcellent.”
    â€œI grilled it over an open fire. Just as if you’d caught it and cooked it yourself.”
    Gregoire ducked outside the tent, came back with a picnic basket. “We brought you a thermos of coffee, raspberry scones, and a cognac nightcap.”
    â€œWonderful.”
    â€œAnd what would you like for breakfast?”
    â€œSurprise us.”
    â€œShould we expect you home by noon?”
    Rudley gave Margaret a jaunty smile. “Unless we decide to toss our unmentionables into the bramble bush and cavort in the brook, or braid daisy chains.”
    â€œI really don’t want to hear this,” said Gregoire.
    â€œAnd how are things back at the ranch?”
    â€œYou will be pleased to know everything is functioning as usual,” said Tim.
    â€œThat’s enough to make me shudder,” said Rudley. He gave them an expectant look as they lingered. “You may leave now.”
    â€œThank you for the treats,” said Margaret. She turned to Rudley. “Wasn’t that sweet of them?”
    â€œThey’re like children,” said Rudley. “You can’t get away from them.”
    â€œNor would we want to.”
    Rudley crossed his eyes. “Why do I sometimes feel like the headmaster of a school for incorrigibles? I’m surprised Tiffany hasn’t shown up.”
    â€œTiffany said she was making fudge this evening.”
    They finished their snack. Rudley collapsed back against his pillow. “Being an innkeeper can be a trial at times.”
    Margaret poured two glasses of cognac. “Oh, you love it.” She handed him a glass. “Bottoms up.”
    Carl Hopper woke to the sound of an approaching car engine. Or was it the sound of silence following the sound of an engine? Light pierced the gap between the curtains. The light cut a swath across the window, then was extinguished.
    The room was dark. He fumbled for the light switch, knocked a glass over, gave up. He was sitting in the recliner in his living room. His jaw throbbed.
    He sorted through a grainy set of mental images. He’d gone to Middleton for a dental appointment. The dentist had given him a