600 Hours of Edward Read Online Free PDF

the garage.”
    “Of course. I don’t want to be rude. You just can’t be too careful, you know? I’m sure you understand.”
    “I didn’t let him go up on the ladder.”
    “OK.”
    She’s now just looking at me. I stare back at her.
    “Is there anything else?” I ask her.
    “No, I guess not. Thanks for letting Kyle help you out, Edward.”
    “All right, then.”
    I close the door. I can tell from the sound outside that Donna stands there for a few seconds before walking across the street to her house.
    I’m as flummoxed as I’ve ever been, I think, although I don’t keep data on that. I may need a new word.
    – • –
    Tonight’s
Dragnet
is the twenty-first episode of the fourth and final season, “Forgery: The Ranger,” and it is one of my favorites. It originally aired on March 12, 1970.
    A character named Barney Regal, played by Stacy Harris, who died many years before I started writing to
Dragnet
actors, tries to pass himself off as a forest ranger. In talking to various groups about forestry, he ends up stealing credit cards and other valuables. Sergeant Joe Friday and Officer Bill Gannon slowly work him over at the office downtown, methodically poking holes in his story until he confesses that he’s not Ranger Barney Regal at all but a common criminal named Clifford Ray Owens.
    I would not want to be a criminal being worked over by Friday and Gannon. They would surely make me admit my crimes. They are very logical men.
    – • –
    I have a couple of candidates for tonight’s letter of complaint. The unhelpful paint man at Home Depot has avoided my wrath so far, and he is deserving of complaint. But I have to concede that the Behr parsley sprig looks pretty good on that garage. He will get a complaint—he deserves one—but it can wait.
    Donna:
    I did not appreciate your uninvited knock on my door this evening. Had you granted me the courtesy of some warning of your visit, I would have been better prepared to answer your questions and more comfortable in talking with you.
    Also, I am uncomfortable addressing you in a familiar way by using your first name. You have left me no choice, however, as you introduced yourself that way. However, I gave you the courtesy of letting you know my last name, and yet you insisted on addressing me as Edward. This, too, is entirely too familiar given our limited interaction.
    Your son, Kyle, is a very courteous young man, if a little exuberant. I can only assume that he learned his manners from someone other than you. That said, I do not like assumptions. I prefer facts. Perhaps we can discuss this issue at a more appropriate time, while referring to each other in an acceptable way.
    I thank you for your consideration.
    Regards,
    Edward Stanton

THURSDAY, OCTOBER 16
    My eyes open at 7:37 a.m. I am on my side, facing the clock. This does not happen often. I usually wake up on my back. On the 290th day of the year (because it’s a leap year), I have awakened at 7:37 for the sixteenth time. There is no correlation between those numbers that I can see, but as I have recorded both in my notebook, my data is complete.
    – • –
    Through the big bay window in the dining room, I can see both the garage (now the color of Behr parsley sprig, although not for long) and, in the other direction, signs of life on Clark Avenue. People are heading to work and school and who knows where else. Today, I will be joining them. I have volunteered to make calls for the Muscular Dystrophy Association. I do not like to talk on the telephone, as I do not do spontaneous conversation well, but I have been assured that I will have a “script” to use, and that I can do. I can read very well. Dr. Buckley encourages me to stay as busy as possible, and volunteering to help the Muscular Dystrophy Association seems like a good way to spend a day.
    I found out that the Muscular Dystrophy Association needed a volunteer through reading the
Billings Herald-Gleaner
a week ago. I am now reading