2 Grand Delusion Read Online Free PDF Page B

peering theatrically around the room. "I don't see them. Why aren't they here?"
    "I'm here!" little Tony called out. Thanks a heap, kid. A wave of laughter broke through the audience, and several board members chuckled.
    Wells chuckled himself, and pointed a disdainful thumb at Tony. "So this young man, members of the board, represents the total extent of the community support for Mr. Burns."
    Unable to contain myself any longer, I jumped up. "There's a big West Side meeting tonight about the Grand Hotel. That's why no one's here."
    Wells gave me the kind of look you'd give a mosquito. "Mr. Burns, don't insult my intelligence. You know as well as I do, that meeting doesn't start until eight. If your neighbors were truly on your side, they could have shown up here for an hour. And besides, where are the petitions? Where are the letters of support?"
    "Hey, I didn't hear about this damn meeting"—no, don't cuss, get a grip—"until this afternoon. I'll bet no one else did either."
    One of the board members cleared his throat loudly. He was a fat-cheeked guy with big ears, bushy eyebrows, and an officious manner who managed to look like a stuffed owl even though he was only in his mid-thirties. "Sir," he said to me, making that salutation sound like an insult, "we mailed out official notices regarding this hearing to all homeowners within one hundred yards of 107 Elm Street exactly one month ago, on September first. We followed the customary, legally mandated procedure." He held up a fistful of papers. "If you so desire, I will be glad to show you documentation."
    "Hey, I'm not saying you didn't send them, I'm saying we didn't receive them. And the other thing is, my neighbors are scared to go up against Pop. They know his rep: he's crooked and he likes to hurt people."
    Someone in the audience gasped. Andrea eyed me in alarm. Shit, had I just gone too far? Had I slipped into some late 60s "off the pigs" time warp? Had I been watching too much Court TV for my own good?
    Was I, in short, making a total ass of myself?
    Evidently Wells thought so, because he counterattacked with gusto. "Mr. Burns, you have exceeded the bounds of civil discourse. To maliciously state these reckless accusations in a public forum, when you know they will be reported in tomorrow's newspaper, is unconscionable . My client is a respected twenty-year veteran of the Saratoga Springs Police Department. As soon as this hearing is over, I will recommend to Mr. Doyle that he institute immediate action against you for slander."
    Jesus, could I really get sued for this? I looked over to Andrea for support, half-expecting her to be glaring at me. But I got lucky—she reached for my hand and squeezed it. That gave me strength. I stood up. "Mr. Chairman, I respectfully request that you postpone your decision on this proposal until your next board meeting, to allow me sufficient time to demonstrate the unanimity of community opposition."
    The chairman gave a sigh so loud I could hear it clearly from my pew. Interestingly, all the other board members were sighing too. Why?
    Then I figured it out. These were sighs of relief. With the media there watchdogging them, the board members were afraid to make any actual decisions. So they were grateful for an excuse to delay. Procrastination—the bureaucrat's best friend.
    And procrastinate they did. The chairman mumbled briefly to the other board members, who rapidly nodded in agreement, and they tabled the issue until November. The battle was over ... for now.
    Andrea and I gathered up Tony and our kids and headed out. As soon as we hit the hallway, the boys immediately started jumping around and practicing their fiercest Ninja Turtle karate moves, undoubtedly their response to all the heavy tension in the air. It took Andrea and me a full minute to corral our little warriors down the stairs to the first floor.
    Which is where Pop Doyle caught up with me.

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    Pop put his short, stubby, muscular hand on my arm. "Mr.